


Not Your Average Hook Up

by RockSaltAndRoll



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Sex, Army!Bucky, Gratuitous Smut, Hook-Up, M/M, Phone Sex, Rimming, Skinny!Steve
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-29
Updated: 2015-03-20
Packaged: 2018-03-09 14:23:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 33,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3253031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RockSaltAndRoll/pseuds/RockSaltAndRoll
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky Barnes is home from the army on two weeks R&R and going crazy. His friend Natasha suggests that he get laid and convinces Bucky to get the Grindr app. Gorgeous tiny blond artist Steve stands out among the profiles and, as nervous as he is, Bucky goes over to his apartment. But he's pretty sure that Hook-ups are not meant to be like THIS.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

James Buchanan Barnes had been back in the States for five days and he was already starting to go crazy, holed up in Natasha’s apartment with nothing, and nobody, to do. He was back home for fourteen days - his mid-deployment leave after six months away – and had nothing to occupy his time. The fact that he hadn’t had sex for so long didn’t help the matter either. Usually, he could work off all his frustration with exercise when not on duty, but back home it wasn’t like he could work out all the time in order to keep himself occupied. Sometimes he wondered if he would ever make it on his own outside of the army.

His friend Natasha was sick of him and his moping.

“I swear to God, James. I will kick your sorry ass out of my apartment if you sigh heavily one more time.”

“I’m sorry,” Bucky groaned, burying his head in his hands. “I’m not used to having so much time to think. I’m driving myself insane.”

Natasha made an impatient noise and tossed him a beer straight from the fridge.

“You need to get laid,” she said matter-of-factly as she sat down on the couch opposite him.

“Oh God, I wish,” he mumbled grumpily, pulling the ring-tab on the can. “But I don’t know anybody here but you, and I have no idea where I can go to meet people and...”

“You are such a tool,” Nat interrupted him, rolling her eyes. “Don’t you have Grindr?”

Bucky almost choked on his beer.

“Uh...no,” he hastily replied. “I’m not a hook-up kind of person, Nat.”

She looked at him over the rim of her beer can.

“James,” Natasha said calmly, “I’m not saying that you’re not a good looking guy or anything, but right now, the only way you’re getting laid is with your right hand, or with a hook-up. You’re here for another week before you’re back to Afghanistan for another six months. I mean, I’m pretty sure that if you could have found a nice young Private to fuck on the first half of your deployment, you would have done that. But you didn’t, so if you don’t get laid now, you’ll have gone a whole year without blowing your load on some guy’s face.”

Bucky looked away. It would be more like sixteen months, but he didn’t really want to tell Natasha that. He took a pointed sip of his beer before he replied.

“What if the guy turns out to be a serial killer or something?”

Nat looked at him like he was stupid.

“In case you forgot, you happened to be a professionally trained killer for the country. I’m pretty sure that you could handle yourself if your hook-up turned out to be a murderer.”

Bucky scowled at her. He considered himself, in general, a decent human being – he hadn’t joined the army to kill, he’d joined to protect and unfortunately, that meant having to point and shoot at a few bad people from time to time. Bucky hated being reminded of that.

Catching himself before he could sigh heavily again, Bucky sat up straighter on the couch and took a deep breath.

“Alright. How does it work?”

Natasha gleefully made him a profile, making him smile his most charming smile before snapping a photo and adding it. Twenty minutes later and he was all ready to go on the hunt, sitting next to Nat on the couch and scrolling through the profiles of guys who were ready and available in the vicinity. 

“Ooh, this guy looks good,” Natasha said, clicking on a profile. “He’s a little older...dark hair, dark eyes...looks like he’d be happy with you calling him ‘daddy’...”

“No,” Bucky said immediately, passing the phone back to her.

“Why? What’s wrong with...’Brock’?”

Bucky bit his lip – the guy had a look about him that he recognised, and hated.

“He looks like he could be pretty brutal. And not in a good way.”

Natasha raised an eyebrow at him, but nodded and thankfully kept scrolling.

“Okay, what about this one?”

He took the phone from her and looked at the picture in the profile – floppy blond hair, big blue eyes, and a gorgeous, full mouth that was made to suck a dick, all set into a sharp, angular, but very pretty fair face. 

“He’s cute, right?” Nat said encouragingly, looking over his shoulder. “And he lives about ten minutes away. Want to send him a message?”

Bucky really did. He was also very nervous about doing so.

“What do I even say?” he asked weakly.

Natasha reached over and took Bucky’s phone from him, her thumbs moving fast over the keys as she typed a message for him.

“Okay: ‘Hey there! I’m a soldier back home on R&R and looking for NSA hook-up. Interested?’”

“NSA?” Bucky repeated, an eyebrow raised doubtfully.

“No strings attached,” Nat clarified, handing the phone back. “Now we just have to wait for him to message you back.”

Bucky was hoping that the cute blond would both message him back and not message him back. Hook-ups were way out of his depth. The truth was that James Buchanan Barnes was a dater, and he was good at it. He excelled at meeting a person, asking for a number, taking them to dinner or drinks, movies, dancing, spending whole evenings talking and being a perfectly charming gentleman, and if the date evolved perfectly, falling into bed with the person at the end of it was just natural.

This whole Grindr situation, however, was making him slightly nervous. On dates, Bucky knew what was expected of him but he’d never ‘hooked-up’ in this manner before. What was he supposed to do? 

His heart nearly leapt out of his chest when the blond messaged him back less than five minutes later : ‘Sure. What time is good for you?’ 

“Wear your uniform,” Natasha told him excitedly when she had sent a message back on Bucky’s behalf.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Bucky began to protest.

“Are you kidding me? You look seriously hot in your uniform and that guy will fall over his own feet to suck your dick the second he sees you in it. I’ll drop you off and pick you up right at the door if you’re worried about being spotted.”

Bucky wasn’t entirely sure that this whole thing was a good idea, but he agreed and went to shower and change.

~

Steve Rogers had been cleaning off his paintbrushes to the background noise of a Metz game when he received the Grindr message and proceeded to drop them to the floor with a loud clatter. It was a miracle that he didn’t drop his phone too.

“Holy Crap!” he exclaimed, causing his friend to tear his eyes away from the TV in alarm.

“What? What’s happened?”

Steve was still blinking at his phone screen, not sure if he was actually seeing the picture of a gorgeous guy or if it was a hallucination.

“Uh...you have to go,” Steve managed to say. “Like now. Right now.”

Sam Wilson scowled from the couch.

“Are you fucking with me Rogers? I’m in the middle of watching a game!”

“I am not fucking with you,” Steve replied absently as he tried to type a reply message. “But I do very much hope to be fucking a very gorgeous soldier in less than half an hour, so unless you wanna be around for that, I suggest you make yourself scarce.”

“Ew,” Sam said from the couch, screwing up his face. “That was more information than I needed. You know Steve, you are lucky that I love you like my own brother, otherwise I would be deeply insulted at being constantly thrown out of your apartment so you can screw guys you meet on Grindr.”

Steve shrugged at him.

“Well it’s not like anyone is gonna date me, Sam. Plenty of guys are willing to fuck me because I look like a teenager and they get to fulfil a sick twisted fantasy without the risk of going to jail, but nobody is going to date...” he waved a hand vaguely in front of his body, “...this.”

“We could find you somebody,” Sam mumbled.

“Yeah, right,” replied Steve dryly. “Such a person does not exist. I have to make do with Grindr hook-ups, and this time I get to do somebody who looks completely fucking gorgeous, pervert or not.”

Sam shook his head wearily and got up from the couch. The trouble with Steve Rogers is that he couldn’t see his own self worth and was too stubborn to believe that he was a good person that people actually liked and wanted to be around. No matter how hard they tried, his friends could not change Steve’s opinion of himself, so Sam sighed heavily and helped Steve to tidy away the empty beer cans on the coffee table, dust the couch clear of crumbs, and help Steve to cover up his unfinished art work.

“You don’t mind me throwing you out, do you?” Steve asked ten minutes later as he walked his friend to the door, suddenly hit by a wave of guilt.

“Yeah, I do,” replied Sam with a grin. “But I get it. Besides, my girlfriend just text me – she’s had a friend staying with her who she’s not seen in a while, but he’s going out for a few hours. I’m gonna finish watching the game at her place.”

Steve nodded.

“Natasha, right?”

“Yeah, that’s right,” Sam grinned.

“Well, you enjoy it.”

Sam snorted with amusement.

“Yeah, and I’m pretty sure you’ll enjoy your soldier, Champ!”

Steve shook his head with a grin and closed the door on his friend. Ten minutes later, he had showered, changed, and was just padding back through his apartment barefoot when there was a knock at the door. Running a hand casually through his hair, Steve straightened up and pulled the door open.

His jaw practically hit the ground.

The man standing there was tall, broad, absolutely beautiful and dressed in a military uniform. Steve noted the sergeant’s stripes on the guy’s arm, dark hair lying flat underneath the cap on his head, blue eyes and a cleft chin that he immediately wanted to bite, and he tried to breathe normally. The soldier’s name tag read ‘Barnes’.

Steve had never wanted to jump somebody in his life as much as he wanted to jump Sergeant Barnes’ dick right then.

“Hi,” the soldier said, giving Steve that charming smile that was in his Grindr profile picture.

Thankfully, Steve recovered quickly. Gathering his wits, he straightened up and looked Sergeant Barnes in the eye, smiling as best he could under the circumstances.

“Hi,” he replied, moving aside to let the soldier inside.

Steve could feel the warmth radiating off the guy as he passed and shivered slightly in anticipation. The guy was even more stunning in real life than in his picture and Steve grinned to himself as the allowed himself to think about just how much he was going to enjoy this. However as he shut the door and turned around, his eyebrows shot up as he found the sergeant standing at attention in the middle of the living room, shoulders straight and squared, chin up, feet slightly apart as though awaiting his orders. Steve started to laugh.

“Wow. I am kinda used to roleplay, but the whole soldier thing is one I’ve never tried out. Guys usually want a schoolboy scenario.”

He watched those blue eyes go wide and a look of mild panic passed over the soldier’s pretty face as he glanced at Steve.

“I...I didn’t...I mean, I...wasn’t here for...”

It hit Steve then – the tall, dark, and ridiculously hot soldier in his living room was a Grindr virgin.

“You’ve never actually done this before have you?” 

Sergeant Barnes’ face crumpled and his broad shoulders slumped.

“No,” he confessed, flushing lightly over his cheeks. “I haven’t. I’m sorry, I should just...”

He turned to leave and Steve almost leapt to block his way.

“Don’t go!” he said, too quickly.

The soldier stopped and looked at him questioningly. Steve was only a few inches from him, head tilted back quite a way in order to see his face. It wasn’t that Steve was particularly tiny, although at five-foot-five-inches he was definitely below average height for a man of twenty-four, and it wasn’t that the soldier was a giant – he couldn’t have been six-feet tall – but their proximity and the fact that Steve was so small framed and the sergeant so broad it seemed as though the difference in height was monumental. Steve huffed out a small laugh and rubbed the back of his neck.

“Don’t go,” he repeated more gently. “Why don’t you sit down, make yourself comfortable, I’ll get you a drink or something, yeah?”

The soldier looked at him warily for a second before breaking into a watery smile.

“I don’t even know your name,” Barnes said weakly.

“It’s Steve.”

The guy nodded slowly.

“I’m Bucky.”

Five minutes later and Bucky was sitting on Steve’s window seat, boots and jacket removed, and a beer can in his hand, looking very adorably sheepish.

“I’m sorry,” Bucky repeated, running a hand through his dark hair. “I honestly had no idea what to expect when I walked in here. I’m so fucking nervous.”

“Don’t be,” Steve replied with a grin as he sat himself down on the couch opposite. “You don’t have to be sorry or nervous – I’m not gonna bite. Well...not hard.”

Bucky snorted in amusement and shook his head. Now that Steve could get a really good look at him, he could see that Bucky had a bone structure to die for, perfectly highlighted by the light shining in through the window behind him.

“I’ll make you a deal,” said Steve. “You sit there and relax, drink your beer, talk if you want, and let me sketch you. No pressure.”

Bucky raised an eyebrow and cast a quick glance around the room. It wasn’t hard to realise that art was what Steve did for a living – sketch pads, pencils, paintbrushes and charcoal could be found on almost every flat surface in the apartment. Bucky nodded.

“Okay,” he replied.

Steve reached over to his coffee table and retrieved his sketch pad and pencil, shuffling back on the couch and resting one foot on the edge of the seat for balance. He got to work immediately, his fingers working swiftly as he sketched out Bucky’s profile.

“So, what kind of name is Bucky?” Steve asked casually.

The sergeant smiled. He was breathtakingly beautiful when he smiled.

“It’s a nickname that I got as a kid,” Bucky explained. “My name is James, but I can’t tell you how many kids I grew up with who were called James or Jamie or Jimmy. So, Bucky comes from my middle name – Buchanan.”

Steve glanced at him over the top of his sketchpad and smiled.

“I like it.”

Bucky smiled back, glancing at his feet shyly.

“Me too, actually.”

They fell quiet for a few minutes as Steve continued to sketch Bucky’s outline and then start to fill in the details of his face. Normally, Steve didn’t study his hook-ups in such detail but to be honest, nobody had been quite the mix of gorgeous and bashful as Bucky Barnes. Usually, somebody turned up, they fucked, and then they left again, and that was the way Steve Rogers liked his sex – easy, fast, and anonymous. Bucky was the first that he’d actually tried talking to in this manner.

“So you’re on leave?”

Bucky smiled, looking a lot more relaxed than when he’d first walked into Steve’s apartment.

“Yeah. I’ve got a couple of weeks back in the middle of my deployment,” he explained. “I’m staying with a friend for a few days, but then I’ve got to visit family. Then it’s back to Afghanistan.”

Steve nodded and smudged a couple of the graphite lines with his finger before continuing his sketch.

“So how did you end up here?” he asked casually.

Bucky laughed softly and rubbed the back of his neck with his hand.

“My friend suggested it,” Bucky confessed. “I’ve never really ‘hooked up’ before. I kinda prefer to take a person out to dinner first.”

“Why me?” Steve asked him.

“Because you’re gorgeous,” replied Bucky softly.

His answer made Steve stop dead in the middle of his sketch to look at him. Bucky looked deadly serious, all trace of his earlier nervousness gone. Steve felt a smile tug at the corner of his mouth – he was short and skinny and his features were too pointed, and he’d never thought anyone would seriously ever find him attractive, never mind gorgeous.  
Suddenly Bucky let out a small laugh.

“I feel like Kate Winslet in that Titanic scene.”

Steve grinned over the top of his sketch pad.

“Kate Winslet was naked for that scene,” he replied jokingly. “If I’d known you wanted to nude model for me…”

Steve trailed off because as he looked at Buck, the soldier’s expression turned thoughtful and just a little mischievous, his tongue running around the inside of his cheek before he sat up straight. Bucky’s fingers grasped the hem of his t-shirt and slowly pulled it upwards and then off over his head, dropping it gently on the floor.  
Steve’s jaw almost hit the floor again and he couldn’t take his eyes away, because Bucky looked like Michaelangelo’s David personified, all smooth skin and defined muscles. 

“Wow,” Steve breathed softly. “If I had a body like that, I wouldn’t do anything but have people pay to draw me all day - I would just be naked all the time.” 

Bucky laughed gently and rubbed the back of his neck again.

"I don’t think I’d mind being naked every day if I get drawn by really hot artists."

"How about getting drawn by me?" asked Steve, willing his hand to continue his sketch.

"That’s what I said, didn’t I?"

Steve couldn’t stop himself from smiling at that. Bucky was holding his head up, chin tilted and grinning with just the barest hint of cockiness, and Steve could imagine that this was the way the soldier was when he was comfortable around people.

"You wanna get naked for me, sergeant?" he asked.

"Maybe…" Bucky replied softly.

Bucky was still kneeling there, shirtless and biting his bottom lip, and shit, Steve wished he had a camera to capture the way Bucky was coyly looking at him from under his eyelashes.

"You know, if you just want me to draw you, then I’ll happily do that," Steve said, and he found that he actually meant it. Bucky Barnes was beautiful, that body of his an absolute dream – it was just a thrill being in the guy’s presence, never mind getting anything else. "If you wanna do something else, well we can do that too. Your choice, no pressure"

Bucky seemed to consider his words for a moment as Steve looked back down at his sketch pad, reviewing the bare bones of the sergeant’s profile, his facial features, the curve of his shoulders, and the barest hint of torso. He heard a metallic clink and glanced up to see Bucky unfastening his belt very slowly, bottom lip still snagged between his teeth as he looked to Steve for approval, hands sliding beneath his waistband and dragging the heavy fabric of his pants down, bit by bit, over the curve of his ass first.

Steve was mesmerised by him, by his movements. Bucky was willing but still a little unsure of himself, watching Steve all the time to gage his reaction. His hand halted in his sketching and Steve knew that he was staring as more of that gorgeous body came into view. His expression must have given Bucky the confidence he needed, because then the sergeant slid his hands over his own bare buttocks, fingernails scraping gently over the skin and Steve made a noise that sounded somewhat desperate and needy. Letting out a loud breath, he ran a hand through his own hair to stop it from going straight to his crotch.

"Damn, soldier," Steve murmured as Bucky gave him a small, shy smile. "You’re a fucking work of art, all on your own."

Bucky ducked his head, smile widening as he bit his lip again and his fingers went back to the waistband of his combat pants, around to the front, pulling them down achingly slow, over the prominent bulge contained inside them until his cock sprang free, gently hitting against his flat, toned stomach. Steve’s mouth began to water as he watched Bucky watching him, pushing his pants further down his spectacularly toned thighs to his knees.

Somewhere in his brain, Steve remembered having read somewhere that when Kate Winslet dropped her robe in that infamous Titanic scene, DiCaprio fluffed up his lines because he was so distracted. If Steve had had any lines to speak, he definitely would have stumbled over them right then.

Bucky was kneeling there, naked but for the pants and underwear still caught around his knees, those blue-grey eyes looking right at Steve and his cock slowly hardening as Steve’s eyes roamed all over that body. Damn it, but now Steve was desperate to get his hands on Bucky, get his mouth on him. They stared at each other and Steve couldn’t believe that he had started to blush with those grey blue eyes fixed on him and growing bigger and darker by the second. Bucky was hard, his dick looking gorgeous and fat and all Steve wanted to do was get his lips wrapped around it. He felt his breath hitch as Bucky dropped to all fours and crawled slowly towards Steve across the floor. Stopping by Steve’s feet, Bucky looked up at him and pressed his mouth to Steve’s knee which was still clad in sweatpants. The way Bucky was kneeling there, cheek resting gently on Steve’s leg and looking up at him with those gorgeous eyes...he looked so submissive and Steve couldn’t help thinking he’d hit the Jackpot with this soldier. 

“God, you are beautiful,” Steve murmured.

Bucky’s eyes fluttered closed as Steve reached out and cupped his face, letting out a soft whimper that when straight to Steve’s cock. Steve just couldn’t wait anymore and he pushed Bucky back on the floor causing the soldier to landed awkwardly with a gasp, flat on his back but with his lower legs still tethered by his pants. Steve stripped his t-shirt off fast and slid from the couch to get in between Bucky’s thighs, stretching his smaller body out over the sergeant’s. 

Steve was hard as a rock inside his sweatpants, grinding hard against Bucky, hands burying in that dark hair and pulling Bucky’s head to the side so that he could get to his neck. Bucky’s eyes rolled back in his head as Steve licked and sucked and nipped at his neck and throat, sucking Bucky’s earlobe into his mouth as he moved against him. 

“Fuck,” Bucky whispered, his hands running down Steve’s back and slipping under the waistband of those sweatpants, tugging that little body as close as he could get it.

Bucky couldn’t ever remember being with such a little firecracker before - Steve knew what he was doing and Bucky was putty in his hands, unable to do anything at all but gasp and whimper and try to pull little Steve closer. He moaned loudly as those gorgeous fingers wrapped around his leaking cock, squeezing firmly as Steve’s hand slid up the length to the head and slowly twisting on the down stroke. It was amazing – Steve’s weight pressing down on him, that hot mouth working the skin on his neck and throat until it was sensitive, and his hands working Bucky’s cock good and fast. If only it hadn’t been so long since another person had done that to him – Bucky had spent the last ten months with only his right hand for comfort and having this gorgeous, confident little guy work him over so expertly was driving him to the edge too fast. Steve was barely at it for a minute before Bucky felt his balls start to tighten.

"Oh my god…S…Steve…I’m…"

It was too late – by the time Bucky had been aware of it, it was already happening. His orgasm hurtled through him hot and fast, his spine arched, head thrown back against the rug, hips thrusting up into Steve’s hand. He was still spurting all over Steve’s hand and his own stomach when his face began to burn with embarrassment. Bucky opened his eyes to find Steve staring down, open-mouthed at his come-covered fingers.

"Shit, I’m sorry," breathed Bucky in shame. He couldn’t believe he’d come so fast. "I’m so sorry…it’s been a really long time…"

"Are you kidding me?" Steve interrupted him, grinning before burying his face in Bucky’s neck again, giving the skin a good, hard suck. "That was so hot."

Bucky let out a nervous, breathless laugh and ran his hands up Steve’s bony sides – he was all sharp angles but his skin was so soft and smooth. 

"It doesn’t bother you that I came way too fast?” he asked weakly.

Steve chuckled into Bucky’s neck.

"I could do this all day," Steve murmured, mouth already resuming its sucking and nipping. "I’m gonna get you all worked up and ready to go all over again, sergeant. Don’t you worry about that."

Bucky’s head dropped back and he groaned loudly as Steve’s teeth sank gently into his shoulder. 

"C’mon," Steve said, pulling back and up onto his knees. "Up."

He hauled Bucky to his feet and pushed him back down almost immediately onto a high-backed chair. Bucky bounced slightly as he sat, and immediately Steve set to work pulling Bucky’s pants the rest of the way off, tossing them to the other side of the room before climbing into Bucky’s lap.

Bucky’s hands went everywhere he could touch - Steve’s bare shoulders, his back, his sides, over that tiny perfect ass and down his legs that were still clad in sweatpants, and all the way back up again into his hair. Steve was grinding down hard against him, hips rolling expertly and having Bucky hard again in moments, that hot little mouth moving all over Bucky’s skin, from behind his ear, down the side of his neck and across his throat. Steve’s hands were back in Bucky’s hair, steering his head whichever way he wanted, and working one side thoroughly before moving onto the other.

Bucky thought he might die of bliss when Steve started to work his way down, mouthing and nipping his way over Bucky’s chest, sliding effortlessly from his lap and onto the floor as he moved down over Bucky’s stomach, skirting around his crotch and beginning to kiss his way across Bucky’s thighs.

Bucky moved his legs apart wider to accommodate the small blond, moaning gently as Steve licked and kissed and softly bit the insides of Bucky’s thighs. He couldn’t help reaching out to pet that soft straw-gold hair, stroking it back from Steve’s face so he could see those sky blue eyes close, long dark eyelashes fanning out over lightly freckled cheeks, a small smile playing across his sinful mouth.

“Oh...my...g...” Bucky panted breathlessly, his words trailing off into a loud moan as Steve’s hands slid around to the back of Bucky’s thighs and hitched his legs up, pulling Bucky to the edge of the chair so that his feet were resting on the seat and his ass was right at the edge.

Bucky almost squirmed off completely when Steve buried his face between his ass cheeks and licked a long wet stripe over his hole, across his balls and up over the length of his dick which was solid again and starting to leak clear droplets of pre-come. Steve did it again, and again, and Bucky couldn’t do anything but dig his fingers into the arms of the chair as Steve’s wicked little tongue had him panting and crying out. Steve was incredibly enthusiastic, making his own appreciative noises as he licked and sucked, tongue delving in and teasing around the sensitive skin until Bucky was dripping wet. 

Bucky was more than ready when Steve’s finger breached him, his hole taking it in easily and greedily. Steve fingered him fast as his lips wrapped around the head of Bucky’s cock and he sucked, slow and soft in complete contrast. Bucky was practically begging for his dick in no time, fingers scraping at Steve’s shoulders, trying to pull him in and up.

“Oh fuck, Steve. That’s good, that’s so fucking good...oh God, I love it...”

Steve sucked softly as he drew up and off with a quiet pop.

“Yeah?” he asked huskily.

Bucky looked amazing, all flushed and dewy, his bare chest heaving with exerted breaths. Steve had been more than content to tease Bucky for what must have been a good half hour, delighting in the heady, musky scent of his skin and the faint taste of soap against his tongue.

“Yeah,” gasped Bucky, looking down at Steve on his knees between his spread legs. “God, I want you in me.”

Steve groaned aloud, turning his head away from Bucky’s dick to sink his teeth gently into the smooth muscular thigh. He knew that he needed to be buried inside Bucky as deep and as quickly as possible. There was a wet patch on the front of his sweatpants where his dick had been leaking pre-come onto the fabric and it smeared over Steve’s leg as he hastily stripped them off, kicking them away from him as he reached into the coffee table for lube and a condom.

"Steve…please…hurry…please…" Bucky babbled, his voice high and desperate as his fingers scrambled across the arms of the chair to find Steve’s hand, or his arm, or any part of him that he could anchor to.

"Shh, it’s okay," Steve murmured, pressing his lips against the back of Bucky’s thigh as he tried to get the condom on as fast as possible. "It’s okay, I’m gonna take care of you…"  
Bucky whimpered softly in reply.

"Please…I want you...need it so bad..."

Steve looked at Bucky, all gorgeously debauched with his legs open wide and ready for him, lips wet and parted. Nobody had ever said that to him in his whole life, that they wanted him. Steve couldn’t wrap his head around the fact that he turned somebody on as much as Bucky seemed to be in that moment, that he made somebody ache with want. He was so used to just being a means to an end, to not caring who his hook-ups were or if they even really saw him instead of a tight hole to fuck, that the sight of Bucky wanting him, Steve Rogers, was almost more than he could take. Steve bit his lip hard as he slicked up, lining himself up and pushing forward into Bucky’s sweet, tight heat.

If he’d thought that Sergeant James Barnes was gorgeous before then, it was nothing to how he looked when Steve started fucking him. Those blue-grey eyes were wide, the colour almost completely swallowed by black pupils, mouth dropped open in surprise and amazement, fingers reaching back to dig into Steve’s ass and pull him in until Steve was seated deep inside him.

“Oh fuck...” Steve gasped.

Bucky reached for him, wrapping his arms around Steve’s shoulders and pulled him in for a kiss. It was fast and messy and desperate, and Steve moaned into Bucky’s open mouth as the soldier pushed his tongue insistently between Steve’s lips. He didn’t make a habit of kissing or letting himself be kissed by his hook ups, but Bucky was beautiful and pliant, and God but he did something to Steve. His heart hammered in his chest as he broke the kiss and bit down gently on Bucky’s chin. Bucky cried out softly, fingers tightening around Steve’s shoulders, digging hard into his skin. 

His legs wrapped around Steve’s small back as Steve moved inside him with long, smooth strokes.

"Oh fuck!” Bucky moaned, his face buried in the space between Steve’s neck and shoulder. “Oh god yeah, just like that. Oh fuck, Steve…that’s amazing."

"God, you feel so good…" Steve breathed, pressing his lips to Bucky’s throat.

It was more than good – it was heavenly. Bucky was tight and hot, and the friction caused by the angle they were at was just outstanding. Steve wanted to stay inside him forever but he knew he couldn’t last longer than a few more minutes once he’d started. 

Bucky’s cock was smearing pre-come all over Steve’s belly and he pulled back a little so that he could wrap his hand around it and jerk Bucky off in time to his thrusts.  
The sergeant’s eyes almost rolled right back into his head as his back arched away from the chair.

"Oh fuck yes, oh god…fuck me…harder, baby, please…"

Steve moaned, immediately picking up his pace in response. He’d been called a lot of things by other guys, but he thought Bucky might be the first to call him baby. It set Steve’s blood on fire and drove him half crazy, desperate to please and to push his hot soldier over the edge again. His thighs burned with the exertion of holding himself in that position, Bucky’s fingertips digging so hard into his skin that they could leave bruises as Steve fucked him steady and deep, his hand stroking Bucky’s cock firmly.

Bucky’s face when he came might have been the most beautiful thing Steve had ever seen, and the noise he made was definitely the most beautiful he’d ever heard. Bucky came hard and breathless, hot white streaks coating his stomach, clinging for dear life to the back of the chair as he looked directly into Steve’s eyes.

"Don’t stop. Don’t stop fucking me," Bucky gasped, even though he was spent and sensitive.

Steve kept going, so close to the edge himself as Bucky let go of the back of the chair and pulled Steve to him, kissing him like his life depended on it, one hand in Steve’s hair and the other wrapped around his back. Steve came gasping into Bucky’s mouth, the rush of heat flooding through him even as he was buried deep inside Bucky, trembling with the force of his orgasm, his legs threatening to buckle under him.

He couldn’t have found the strength to resist if he’d tried, allowing the gorgeous soldier to pull him up and into his lap, both of them whimpering softly as they kissed, blood pounding in their veins. Steve was definitely not used to this kind of come-down, being cradled in strong arms, hands gently stroking his skin and through his hair. It felt amazing and he lost himself in it, in Bucky’s mouth, and the heat of his body, those hands stroking his face, his back, his hair. 

"Wow…" Bucky murmurs when they finally pulled apart for a moment.

"Yeah…" Steve replied, with a small, breathless chuckle.

He couldn’t figure out why, but he could have stayed like that all night with Bucky, kissing and petting and staring into each other’s eyes. But he knew he’d have to kick Bucky out soon, because that’s how these things worked - you turned up, you fucked, you parted ways and this time should be no different. All the same, Steve remained curled up against Bucky’s body, continuing to kiss him until he started to shiver. 

“You okay?” Bucky murmured, grey-blue eyes searching his face with concern.

“I’m fine,” replied Steve quietly. “I’m just cold.”

Bucky bit his lip and slowly unwound his arms from around Steve’s body.

“Sorry,” he said. 

Steve wished that Bucky would wrap him up again, that he could ask the soldier to carry him to bed and burrow under the covers with him, keeping him there until at least the morning. Sighing softly, he slid from Bucky’s lap and stood, bending over to retrieve his sweatpants. 

The spell was broken and they were back to being strangers again, Bucky already looking as shy and nervous as when he’d first arrived. Steve smiled at him.

“Are you okay?”

The sergeant had his feet on the floor and was sitting properly on the chair, trying to disentangle his underwear from his pants. He let out a soft laugh.

“Yeah, I just...wow...”

Steve snorted with laughter and covered his face with his hands.

“Oh God,” he replied. “I know!”

He peeked through his fingers to find Bucky looking at him with a shy smile and he dropped his hands.

“Are all hook ups like that?” Bucky asked.

“Hell no,” Steve replied quickly. “That was...that was something else.”

That had been something amazing, he wanted to say. Bucky gave him a bashful smile.

“It was,” he said before pulling his underwear free of his pants and pulling them on.

Bucky barely managed to hunt down all of his clothes that were strewn about the room. He was still covered in his own come, sweat, and Steve’s saliva, feeling sticky but walking on air. He watched Steve out of the corner of his eye as he re-dressed and sent a text to Natasha to come and get him. His brain could barely process what had just happened – that he’d just been spectacularly fucked by the most seriously gorgeous guy he’d ever seen close up.

If he closed his eyes, Bucky could still see the image of Steve, a thin sheen of perspiration on his forehead, sky-blue eyes wide and framed with the most impossibly long eyelashes, plump lips wet as his mouth dropped open as he moved over Bucky and inside of him. It was enough to make Bucky blush and he hoped to god that the memory would never leave him.

He had come so hard, loved every single second of it, and completely forgotten that this was a hook-up and not a date. Steve had kissed him back, had moaned softly into Bucky’s mouth and ran his fingertips over Bucky’s face as the sergeant had held him close and Bucky hadn’t wanted to let him go. Now they were getting dressed again and any second, Natasha would text him and tell him that she was downstairs waiting to pick him up.

Steve picked up his t-shirt from where it had been abandoned on the couch and his sketchbook fell to the floor. Bucky bent to retrieve it and was taken aback by the pencil sketch on the top page. Steve couldn’t have been drawing him or more than ten minutes but the face on the picture looked just like Bucky’s – the nose, the eyes, the curve of his chin were all perfect replicas.

“That’s great,” Bucky said in surprise. “You’re really talented.”

The blond artist’s mouth quirked up at one corner.

“Keep it if you like,” he replied.

“You don’t want it?”

“It’s not my best work,” Steve said with a shrug. “Besides, maybe I can convince you to come back some time so I can improve on my first version.”

Bucky bit back a grin.

“I don’t think I’d take too much convincing,” he murmured.

As Steve began to grin at him, Bucky’s phone went off – Natasha was downstairs. Bucky sighed.

“My friend is here,” he said quietly.

“Okay,” replied Steve, ripping the page from his sketchbook and handing it to Bucky, who folded it carefully and placed it in his shirt pocket.

They were quiet as Steve walked him to the door, Bucky having no idea what to say until Steve grabbed his sleeve and tugged him to a halt.

“Hey,” Steve said quietly, blue eyes serious. “When you ship out again? Just be careful, okay? Make it back in one piece.”

“Okay,” Bucky murmured.

Steve kissed him, just once on the cheek, his lips soft of Bucky’s skin, and then the soldier was walking away in a daze. He passed a guy on the stairs on his way down to Natasha’s car who winked at him and grinned. If Bucky hadn’t have been still slightly shell shocked, he might have given the guy a dirty look, but as it was, he was mussed and flushed and his legs were jelly - everyone in the world could probably tell he’d just been fucked to within an inch of his life and loved it, and Nat laughed at him when he got into the car.

"Jeez Barnes! Did the guy have a magic dick or something? You look like you’ve just seen the face of God!" she said, her face split into a wide grin.

Bucky turned to her and shook his head in disbelief. 

"Nat…he had magic everything. Hands down, THE hottest guy I’ve ever been with. I…I don’t know how to recover from that."

She laughed again and patted his knee gently before putting the car into drive.

"C’mon soldier," she says, grinning. "Let’s get you home."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies to everyone who read this chapter the day it was posted - I wasn't 100% satisfied with the sex scene so I went back and rewrote half of it.

“Stop...”

Steve’s voice came out resigned and he hated himself for it. He was on his hands and knees on his living room floor, naked from the waist down with a guy about his own age buried balls-deep inside of him. The relentless slap of flesh on flesh suddenly ceased, leaving the apartment eerily quiet.

“You okay, man?” came the breathless question from behind him, a hand smoothing across his lower spine.

“Yeah...” Steve replied as he rocked forward – the guy’s dick slid out of him and Steve screwed his nose up at the uncomfortable feeling of being empty and gaping. He turned and sat on the carpeted floor, looking apologetically at the confused looking fella kneeling completely naked in the middle of Steve’s living room. “I’m sorry, I’m just not feeling this at all.”

Dark eyebrows shot up and then knitted together.

“Did I do something wrong?” the guy asked, looking hurt.

Steve sighed and shook his head.

“No.”

Except, the guy kinda had done something wrong, but through no fault of his own - he couldn’t help _not_ being the person that Steve really did want buried inside of him.

Steve’s problem was that he hadn’t been able to stop thinking about his encounter with Sergeant James Barnes a few days earlier. Up until that point, Steve had been remarkably content with the way his sex life functioned. He enjoyed sex and he liked that nothing had to get complicated or emotionally messy when somebody came over for the sole purpose of fucking. Steve was definitely okay with having no expectations of somebody and for them to want nothing more from him than to screw him. Once it was over, they parted ways and got on with life.

Then there had been Bucky – the unbelievably shy, completely adorable and sexy-as-fuck soldier who looked like 1950s Marlon Brando and had the prettiest cock Steve had ever seen in his life. He couldn’t explain it, but Bucky had been...different. Not just that the soldier was easily the most attractive person he’d ever been with, but there had been...something...between them. Steve had no idea what it was but it was enough for him not to be able to stop thinking about it for a whole week.

He’d thought that another fuck would help him move on from it, but he’d been wrong. His hook up had been decent looking and gave a fantastic blow job, but Steve just didn’t want him. It wasn’t the same – there had been no ‘spark’.

Thankfully, the guy wasn’t spectacularly upset with being stopped mid-coitus , and less than a couple of minutes later, he was re-dressed and out of Steve’s apartment, leaving Steve to thoroughly scrub himself clean in the shower like there was a mark on him that he couldn’t clean off.

~

Bucky hadn’t been able to stay the whole two weeks in Natasha’s apartment; not that he didn’t like spending time with family or anything, it’s just that they tended to be a little too much at times and he felt suffocated. However he still had to spend a bit of time with them before having to go back to Afghanistan.

It was something akin to torture, once the initial hugs and kisses and squeals of delight and dyed down and they started questioning him. Bucky would much rather have withstood interrogation by the Taliban than have everybody continually asking him about his love life. They were all incredibly supportive of him, but there was only so many times Bucky could tell them that dating within the army was a complete fucking minefield of complications that were best avoided.

Worst of all, he could not get Steve out of his mind – he’d zoned out at dinner with his sister and her boyfriend, remembering how Steve had tongue fucked him on a chair and absolutely blown his mind. The thought hadn’t really been appropriate for the dinner table. Bucky had been at his grandmother’s for breakfast when he spotted her old, high-backed chair as he walked through her lounge and suddenly could recall Steve’s face, flushed and beautiful as he’d pushed so effortlessly into Bucky and made him cry out.

Their encounter had replayed over and over in his head for the whole duration of his time at home. Bucky’s mind kept drifting back to dark lash-framed blue eyes looking at him from over the top of a sketchbook, to soft straw-blond hair falling gently in front of them and the way Steve moved his head to flip it out of the way, to those gorgeous hands with their long fingers that just worked all kinds of magic...

His family had kept throwing him strange glances and after four days, he was glad to get back to the safety of Natasha’s apartment.

Bucky was acting pathetic. He knew he was acting pathetic because he was sitting on Natasha’s couch, staring at Steve’s Grindr profile picture on his phone and Bucky never did that kind of thing. It was just that Steve had been...unbelievable. He was small and cute, very sure of himself, funny, and an absolutely amazing fuck.

He was too busy thinking about it to notice Natasha sneaking up behind him, and before he knew it she had snatched the phone from his hand.

“Are you fucking serious, Barnes?” she asked, an eyebrow quirked as she looked from the phone screen to Bucky.

He groaned aloud and covered his face with his hands.

“I know, I’m ridiculous,” he muttered.

“Was his dick really that bomb?”

Bucky dropped his hands and gave her a small, smug smile.

“Oh yeah,” he replied.

Natasha laughed.

“Why don’t you just send him another message?” she asked, sitting down on the couch opposite and pulling her knees up to her chest.

“And say what?” Bucky asked, running a hand over his hair. “’Hey, remember me? You fucked me so good that I’m having an existential crisis. Can you do it again?’”

Natasha smirked.

“Well, you wouldn’t be lying. That’s absolutely what you want.”

“What I _want_ ,” Bucky replied with a small sigh, “Is to ask him out to dinner; the problem with that being the fact that I’m leaving the country tomorrow for another six months, so it’s pointless.”

“So what’s wrong with just another hook up?” she asked him.

Bucky couldn’t come up with a good excuse not to do it – if he was going away the following day, then at least he could spend his last evening in the country getting fucking into the floor by the hottest little blond he’d ever met.

~

Steve was putting the finishing touches on a commissioned piece when he received Bucky’s message and, for the second time, almost dropped his phone.

‘Hey,’ the message read. ‘I know this sounds kinda corny, but this is my last night before I go back to Afghanistan - are you free?’

Steve ‘s breathing began to speed up and he had to mentally shake himself. God yes, he was free for Bucky Barnes.

‘How soon can you get here?’ he typed in response.

It turned out that Bucky could get to Steve’s in about thirty minutes which gave him just about enough time to get a shower and was all the charcoal that he’d been using from his skin. Steve wasn’t nervous as such but he was definitely excited, especially at the thought of getting his hands and mouth on Bucky’s body again.

Somehow though, he found himself making an effort to look...like he’d made an effort, abandoning his usual home attire of sweatpants in favour of his most comfortable pair of jeans and a light button-down shirt. He even considered putting some product in his hair so that it would look a little less flat, but thought that it was going to end up a mess with fingers in it anyway, so he didn’t bother.

Steve fussed around his apartment, turning off the main lights in favour of dimmer lamps, and he even put a blues CD on with the volume turned low. He didn’t know what the hell he was doing. Bucky had been to his apartment before - hell, countless others had come to his apartment before and Steve had never felt the need to this much effort.

He frowned as he shoved a few books out of view and contemplated turning the music off again, but then there was a knock on the door and the thought was dismissed as he hurried to answer it.

Bucky Barnes was just as gorgeous as Steve remembered him, even if he wasn’t in uniform this time, but in jeans and a button down shirt with a dark jacket, his dark hair uncovered and swept back from his face.

"Hey ," the soldier said, smiling at him.

"Hey."

They looked at each other, grinning, Bucky still looking slightly bashful and Steve feeling like his palms were sweating. He huffed out a laugh as he stepped aside to let Bucky in. Instead of standing to attention this time, the soldier looked about him calmly -Steve was only slightly disappointed.

"Is that Billie Holliday?" Bucky asked, cocking his head to the side like an adorable puppy to catch the quiet sounds of the music playing.

"Yeah," replied Steve, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked away. "I thought…maybe…I can turn it off if you don’t like…"

"No," Bucky interrupted him with a shy smile. "I like Billie Holliday."

Damn, that man was cute as hell, hands in his jeans pockets, biting his bottom lip and looking so bashful. 

"I’m really glad you messaged me," he admitted.

Bucky’s smile widened.

"Yeah?" he asked.

Steve nodded and grinned. They were still both standing like dumbasses in his hallway.

“I didn’t expect to see you back so soon,” Steve told him.

"So you actually DID expect me back?” Bucky replied, his chin tilting upwards slightly and his smile turning a little smug.

"Well, I did say I wanted another opportunity to draw you."

Bucky gave a low huff of amusement.

"You got me all the way over here just to draw me?" He asked.

"That depends on what you want. It’s your last night, we can do whatever you like ."

Steve watched Bucky bite his lower lip, teeth sinking into soft pink flesh, making little white indents.

"I’d really like to kiss you again," Bucky said quietly.

Steve smiled. Bucky had no idea just how much Steve wanted to kiss him too.

”What are you waiting for?” He asked, his voice low.

They looked at each other for a couple of seconds longer before Bucky took his hands from his pockets, stepped closer to Steve and slipped a hand around his waist.

The size difference felt a little ridiculous - Bucky all tall and broad while Steve was small and skinny. His head tilted back a long way to look at the soldier at such close proximity. There was a heartbeat, a second where he looked into blue-grey eyes, and then they were kissing.

It wasn’t romantic in the slightest. Their kissing was immediately deep, slow for all of five seconds before it it them both just how good it was. Steve’s hands had started lying flat against Bucky’s chest but soon found themselves curling into fists, grabbing the fabric of his shirt and pulling him closer.

Bucky’s hands were in his hair, mouth pressed hard against his and Steve moaned aloud, the sound smothered. Tongues roughly shoved at each other, teeth nipped at lips, and their breathing fast and hard as they sought out the best angle.

Steve’s fingers began assaulting the buttons of Bucky’s shirt, fumbling with the top few before losing all patience and pulling the bottom of the shirt apart roughly, sending the last couple of buttons scattering across his floor.

They pulled apart slightly, panting.

"Get your fucking clothes off sergeant," Steve gasped, pushing Bucky’s shirt together with his jacket over those broad muscular shoulders.

"Yes sir," Bucky murmured in response.

It was like somebody had hooked a finger behind Steve’s belly button and yanked hard - those words made his knees weak and his breath rushed out of his body in a harsh gasp.

A big strong man was stripping for him and calling him ‘sir’…and damn it but Steve found he _liked_ that. A lot.

~

Steve was neither passive nor gentle, even when flat on his back with his legs wrapped around Bucky’s hips. He constantly touched, fingernails scraping lightly across Bucky’s skin and his hands went to Bucky’s biceps, his shoulders, up into his hair as they kissed. God, but Steve was an amazing kisser - his body arched up into Bucky’s as their tongues pressed against each other and Steve made tiny, soft moans when he sank his teeth into Bucky’s bottom lip, just for a second, before diving back in for another kiss.

It made Bucky feel dizzy and lightheaded, breathing hard through his nose because his mouth was otherwise occupied.

Steve was really tiny, and Bucky loved it. Wherever he put his hands he was met by warm, smooth skin, so soft. Steve’s ass was just perfect, like two halves of a ripe peach, fitting just right in his hands. He loved the way Steve gasped when he gently squeezed them, his light, throaty chuckle and long exhale as he settled back down into kissing Bucky again.

They had a perfect rhythm going, a soft, undulating grind against each other, hot and hard, and every few minutes Bucky would grind down at exactly the same time as Steve’s hips pushed up, and those sky blue eyes would snap open and focus on him, wide and beautiful. Bucky would feel a sharp tug just behind his naval and groan softly into Steve’s mouth.

Teeth nipped sharply at his lower lip again, then his chin, and down to his neck. Bucky tilted his head back automatically to give Steve easier access.

"God, you are so ripped," Steve breathed into Bucky’s neck.

Bucky groaned in reply as Steve’s fingernails raked down his arms from shoulder to elbow, and he thrust a hand into Steve’s soft, straw-blond hair. Steve lifted his face out of Bucky’s neck and beamed at him, panting heavily.

"Just so you know," he murmured, hips canting up, "I don’t usually do this."

"Do what?" Bucky whispered.

"This," Steve replied, wrapping both arms around Bucky’s shoulders and pulling him back down to kiss him slow and deep.

They were both gasping for breath when they broke apart.

"Why me?" Bucky panted.

"I dunno," Steve replied, occupied in placing butterfly kisses across Bucky’s throat again. "Something about you…something about this…just makes me want it. Makes me want you…"

Bucky let out a low, needy whimper and buried both hands into Steve’s hair, gently pulling his head back so they were looking at each other. Steve’s mouth was red, wet, and swollen, his face flushed pale rose, making the tiny golden freckles across his nose and cheeks stand out. He was the most beautiful thing Bucky had ever seen close up.

"Me too," he whispered.

Steve smiled, biting his bottom lip as though he was attempting to hide it and gave a huff of amusement as he pulled Bucky back down, long fingers burying into dark hair.

Bucky kissed his way down over Steve’s long, slim neck and across sharp collarbones, his fingertips chasing his mouth as he smoothed over them. He breathed Steve in as he worked down Steve’s chest and concluded that he’d never smelled anything as good as Steve’s skin. He didn’t really smell like anything - not of soap or deodorant or body spray, just fresh perspiration and pheromones, and Bucky could have stayed there all night with his nose pressed against Steve’s skin.

Steve sighed softly as Bucky’s mouth moved over him, his fingers carding firmly through Bucky’s hair, guiding his head this way and that, right to the spot he wanted Bucky to work on. He let out a gentle groan when Bucky hit the right spot and his grip on Bucky’s hair loosened a little, letting him be for a while until he wanted Bucky to move on.

He smiled to himself as he felt the pressure on the top of his head, not hard, but definitely insistent. Bucky laughed.

"Tryin’ to tell me somethin’, Steve?" He asked, nuzzling gently at the top of the coarse thatch of dark blond hair at Steve’s pubic bone.

The blond gave a low chuckle.

"Yeah," Steve replied. "Stop being a fuckin’ pricktease and suck me already."

Bucky grinned and pressed a kiss low on Steve’s concave stomach.

"Are you always this bossy?" Bucky murmured.

"Are you always this fuckin’ slow?" Countered Steve, his hips tilting upwards to try and get Bucky’s mouth closer to where he wanted it to be. "Just put your mouth on my dick, Sergeant."

"Yes, sir," replied Bucky, mouth still pressed to Steve’s stomach.

He hadn’t even moved, but Steve gasped and let out a small groan just as he had earlier, his fingers tightening in Bucky’s hair again.

"God, you really like me calling you that, don’t you?"

Steve started to laugh, the sound breathless as Bucky shifted on the couch.

"Yeah," admitted Steve. "Yeah, I really do….oh!"

His voice trailed off as Bucky pressed a kiss to the top of Steve’s cock. He really had the most perfect dick - not too long or too thick, too small or too thin. Bucky’s tongue ran lightly over the frenulum and over the tip, tasting the slight-salt drop of pre-come he found there and delighting in Steve’s low moan.

It fit in his mouth perfectly, like his mouth was made to take Steve’s cock alone and nobody else’s. Bucky whimpered as his lips slid easily down the length, letting the tip just nudge the back of his throat as his nose brushed coarse sandy-blond hair.

Steve looked gorgeous on his back with his legs spread wide to accommodate Bucky, back arched and head thrown back, two hands pulling and stroking at Bucky’s hair.

"Fuck, your mouth is so wet…so fuckin’ good."

Bucky hummed contentedly around the dick in his mouth, keeping his tongue flat against the underside as he moved up slowly, pausing to suck the head, short, fast, and hard just to hear Steve curse aloud in that low, breathless voice.

Steve’s fingertips massaged Bucky’s scalp, firm and steady, and Bucky could have happily have stayed there all night with his mouth filled and his hair being petted.

After a while, he felt Steve tug at his hair, pulling Bucky’s head up and off and leaving his mouth empty, lips glistening wet. Steve’s blue eyes were almost black as he sat up and climbed into Bucky’s lap, wrapping his arms around the Sergeant’s neck.

"What do you like?" Steve murmured, lips grazing Bucky’s throat. "Tell me."

Bucky groaned and ran his hands up Steve’s smooth sides, feeling the sharp bump of ribs underneath his soft skin.

"I like everything," he admitted.

"Well that’s vague," Steve replied with amusement, continuing to gently mouth at Bucky’s neck.

"Sorry," he breathed.

Steve’s lips clamped down on the side of his neck and sucked hard, causing Bucky to gasp and dig his fingertips into Steve’s sides. Steve suckled for a few seconds and let go, kissing the skin which was now reddened and sensitive.

"Do you like when I do that?" Steve whispered.

Bucky gave a shaky nod.

"Yeah…"

Steve moved his lips down an inch and suckled down again. Bucky couldn’t stop his loud moan.

"You like being fucked, don’t you?" Steve continued, his breath warm against Bucky’s skin. "Do you want me to fuck you again?"

"Yes, and yes," Bucky replied with a chuckle. "My god, you felt amazing last time…"

"I could say the same about you," said Steve mildly.

He gave Bucky’s neck one last, soft suck and then started kissing his way up to his ear, teeth nipping gently at the fleshy lobe.

"On your side," Steve commanded in a soft voice, giving Bucky’s ear one last nip as he drew back and climbed from Bucky’s lap again.

~

Steve had worked Bucky open with his fingers, on their sides on the couch that really wasn’t wide enough for them both, even lying chest to chest with Bucky’s leg draped over Steve’s hip. He didn’t think they’d stopped kissing the whole time, Bucky’s hands cupping Steve’s face and whimpering softly into his mouth whenever Steve’s fingers did something he particularly liked. Now he was on his knees on the lumpy couch cushions with Bucky lying on his belly, ass in the air and giving his dick a few long, languid strokes as he waited for Steve to unwrap the condom.

"Are you always this slow?" Bucky murmured, echoing Steve from earlier.

Steve gave Bucky’s ass a playful slap, making the soldier squirm with delight.

"Do you want my cock in you or not, Sergeant?" He asked, finally getting the packet open and rolling on the condom. Bucky chuckled.

"Yes sir," he replied quietly. "I want your cock in me, sir."

Steve groaned aloud and reached swiftly for the bottle of lube. Bucky had quickly realised what that did to him and the smart bastard seemed determined to call him ‘sir’ as much as possible just to drive Steve crazy. He slicked up fast and lined up, gripping Bucky’s hips tightly as he pushed forward. Bucky inhaled sharply and Steve matched it as he slid in smoothly and slowly, Bucky’s body tight and hot around him.

"Fuck…" Bucky breathed, as Steve flattened out against that broad, muscular back, pressing a small kiss between Bucky’s shoulder blades.

"You okay?" Steve whispered.

"Yeah…oh fuck yeah, I’m great," Bucky replied.

Steve couldn’t help but laugh at his response and he slipped his arms around the beautiful soldier, peppering his shoulders with kisses as he started to move. He rocked his hips slowly, keeping deep and hard inside Bucky’s body. Under him, the sergeant gasped and moaned into the couch cushions, pushing back against Steve and arching his back into him.

"Fuck, you feel so good, Steve…"

"Yeah?" Steve murmured into Bucky’s ear, nipping the lobe with his teeth. "You like it, baby?"

"I love it," Bucky whimpered, angling his face towards Steve’s. "Love having you fuck me…"

His mouth searched blindly for Steve’s, and Steve rewarded him with a kiss, small and breathless. Steve could feel the sweat roll down his spine and pool at the base of his back as he increased his pace. Bucky sounded so beautiful when he was getting fucked, loud moans and the occasional whispered ‘yes’ and ‘more’ and ‘harder’. Bucky’s hand slid down his body to between his legs, fingers wrapping around his hard cock and tugging in time with Steve’s thrusts.

"Oh god, yeah," Steve murmured. "You getting close there, Buck?"

"Yes," groaned Bucky, pushing back against him even harder. "I’m right on the edge…"

"You gonna come for me?"

Bucky laughed breathlessly.

"Only if you fucking pound me!" He replied.

Steve gave a low growl and did just that, teeth sinking into the firm muscle of Bucky’s left shoulder, fingertips digging into his hips. Bucky’s shouts were muffled by the couch cushions as Steve fucked him hard as he could, feeling his thighs ache with the effort and the pressure build low in his belly. The soldier came just before Steve did, spilling all over his own hand with a low cry of what sounded like Steve’s name. That was what sent Steve over the edge and he pulled back fast, only just managing to get the condom off his dick before his whole body tensed and he came hard, painting hot white streaks across the inside of Bucky’s thigh. Breathing hard, Steve sagged forward, his legs refusing to hold his weight up any longer. He fell across Bucky’s back again as the soldier started to laugh.

"My god, you sure know how to fuck," he giggled.

Steve snorted with amusement and pressed a single soft kiss to Bucky’s back.

"You sure know how to moan," he countered.

Bucky gave a contented hum and squirmed slightly as Steve hauled himself upright and looked about for something to clean them both up with. He used his own shirt to wipe down Bucky’s thigh and then clean the cool semen from the soldier’s hand. Bucky twisted and turned onto his back as Steve threw the shirt into the corner of the room, and then suddenly he was pulled in by those strong arms, Bucky’s mouth capturing his in a kiss. Steve loved it, lying curled up against Bucky’s chest, both of them covered by the blanket he kept over the back of the couch for Sam. He could feel Bucky’s heartbeat slow, his fingers wrapped around the cool metal dog tags around Bucky’s neck. Bucky nuzzled and kissed his hair, fingertips trailing patterns across Steve’s bony shoulder.

"So…" Steve murmured eventually. "Six months?"

Bucky’s chest rose and fell as he sighed.

"Six months," he confirmed.

Steve gently nodded and snuggled a little closer, not wanting to let this beautiful man go just yet.

"Okay," Steve whispered.

~

It was well after midnight when Bucky jolted awake again. Steve had still been asleep on him, but stirred awake with a soft noise as he felt Bucky move.

“Hmm?” Steve murmured. “What? What time is it?”

“Late,” Bucky replied quietly as he eased out from under Steve and began the search for his clothes. “I should be getting back – my friend will be worried.”

In truth, Bucky wasn’t sure if Natasha would be very concerned about him at all, but he’d stayed long enough. This was still a hook up after all – no matter how much he liked Steve, no matter how amazing he was and how great a time they had, this was what it was, and Bucky had to go.

“Okay,” replied Steve, his voice sleep soft.

He looked so incredibly adorable, and damn it but he looked young as he sat there naked and wrapped in a blanket, his hair sticking up at all angles and his blue eyes heavy with sleep. It struck Bucky that he didn’t even know how old Steve was. He’d never thought to check.

Bucky pulled on his jeans and found his way into his shirt, fastening up as many buttons as it had left on it. One shoe was in the middle of the room and the other almost by the door, and his jacket a big jumbled mess in the hallway. Steve had managed to get off the couch by then, the blanket wrapped around him and pulled tightly. He still looked half asleep and so cute.

“I had a great night,” Bucky said to him as he reached the door.

Steve gave him a slow smile.

“I had a great night too.”

Bucky matched his smile and bit his lip. They looked at each other for a moment, and then Steve stepped forward and kissed his cheek, just like the first time.

“See ya, Bucky,” Steve said quietly.

“G’night, Steve,” he replied.

It was a short and concise farewell. Bucky hadn’t expected anything else, and he was going off to Afghanistan with the most amazing memories.

~

Steve slept the sleep of a man who had spent the evening having sex with a very gorgeous person which had ended in a spectacular orgasm, followed by several hours of snuggling on the couch.

He was, however, very rudely awakened far too early the next morning by a persistent hammering on his front door that could only be one person.

Groaning in annoyance, Steve dragged himself out of bed and pulled on his sweatpants, climbing into his t-shirt as he walked through his apartment to answer the door to Sam.

His friend stood there, beaming his signature toothy grin, and holding up coffee and bagels.

"Good Morning, sunshine!" Sam said cheerfully as he walked into the apartment. "Did I wake you?"

"Yeah, you did," replied Steve with a sigh. "You know you did, you asshole."

Sam grinned and passed Steve one of the cups of coffee he’d picked up from their favourite diner down the street.

"Late night?"

"Yeah, I didn’t go to bed till one," Steve admitted as he gratefully accepted the drink, turning the cup around in his hands a couple of times to warm them up.

Sam raised an eyebrow at him.

"That’s late for you."

"Hmm," agreed Steve, blowing on his coffee before looking up and noticing Sam’s look. "I had my really hot Army Sergeant back over last night," he added with a small smile.

Both of Sam’s eyebrows shot up.

"Until one in the morning?"

Steve’s grin grew wider and there was no way of hiding it, not even when he took a sip of his still-hot coffee.

"Well what happened there?" Asked Sam, taking a bagel from the bag he’d brought with him and settling on the couch to listen.

Steve’s smile was almost splitting his face in two as he looked at his cup, feeling his cheeks grow warmer.

"I dunno, he just…came over and…stuff happened and…I didn’t want him to leave right away. He’s cuddly, and I liked it. I fell asleep on him for a bit."

Steve had more than liked it. He’d been warm and comfortable sandwiched between the back of the couch and Bucky’s chest, his head resting right over the soldier’s heart and strong fingers carding through his hair.

He’d felt like it was something he could very easily want on a more permanent basis.

Sam’s jaw was practically on the floor, his bagel abandoned as he stared at his friend.

"Am I hearing that right? You had the guy back over, had sex with him again, and then let him stick around to snuggle for several hours? What got into you? Are you okay?

Steve was still grinning as he rubbed the back of his neck.

"Yeah…I think I feel pretty great actually," he replied.

Sam shook his head and started to laugh.

"So you’re keeping in touch, right?"

Steve took a deep breath but let it all out again in a heavy sigh. He’d thought about it. He would be lying to himself if he tried to say he hadn’t thought about while he’d been curled up against Bucky’s chest with the soldier nuzzling Steve’s hair and trailing his fingers lightly down Steve’s side as they came down from their post-coital high. He’d decided against it.

"No point," he told Sam as his smile slipped and because far less elated. "I don’t know how we’d do that if he’s in Afghanistan for six months…"

Sam looked at him thoughtfully.

"But you would if he could?"

"Well, yeah, I guess," replied Steve, because he would have liked the chance to see Bucky again.

The Sergeant was a totally sweet guy, fantastic in bed, and damn it, Steve LIKED him. Bucky had slipped through all of Steve’s defences and had made himself pretty unforgettable.

Sam sat up and passed Steve the paper bag.

"Eat your bagel," he said simply. "I’ll be back in a minute."

Steve frowned in confusion, but he dug out the warm, fresh cinnamon bagel and took a bite as Sam took out his phone and wandered through Steve’s apartment to another room. He was finished his bagel by the time Sam walked back into his living room, stuffing his phone back into his pocket and looking serious.

"Everything alright?" Steve asked.

Sam took a deep breath.

"Okay, I’ve got something I have to say to you," Sam replied.

"That sounds ominous," mumbled Steve.

Sam ignored him.

"I’m just gonna come out and say it - your soldier is my girlfriend’s best friend"

Steve was thrown.

"W-what?," he stammered.

"When I went to Natasha’s last week," Sam explained, "and you had your soldier around, she’d told me that she’d just been at your building, dropping her friend off. It took all of a minute to figure it out."

Steve stared at him, confused.

"Alright, but what has this got to do with me?"

"Because," Sam said slowly, "Natasha is driving him to base right now - his flight is in a couple of hours, and you don’t have to be family to keep in contact with a deployed military asset."

Steve blinked, his brain slowly processing the information.

"Which means…?"

A slow smile spread across Sam’s face.

"Which means, if you want him to have your phone number, I can get it to him before it’s too late."

Steve could feel his pulse begin to speed up as his friend continued to grin at him.

"Yeah," Steve found himself saying. "Let’s do it."

~

Bucky hadn’t stopped grinning since the moment he’d woken up. Even on the car journey back to base with Natasha talking away beside him as she drove, Bucky’s smile never slipped despite his cheeks beginning to ache.

"Oh my god, look at you," Nat said, stealing a glance at him. "You look so cute when you’ve just been fucked."

"Shut up!" Bucky replied, laughing.

"I can still see your hickey," she added.

Bucky grinned and adjusted the collar of his shirt in an attempt to cover the mark.

He had made it back to Natasha’s apartment just after one in the morning, still fuck-drunk and missing half the buttons off his shirt from where Steve had ripped it off of him.  
Bucky had crashed face-down on the bed in Natasha’s spare room still fully dressed and slept soundly. He was really going to miss sleeping in a real bed for the next six months.

Natasha had been waiting for him to wake up for about an hour, sitting on the empty side of the bed with a cup of tea and casually reading A Handmaid’s Tale. When Bucky had cracked open an eye and found Natasha eyeing the line of visible red-purple bruises on his neck, he groaned aloud and covered his head with the pillow to hide the ridiculous grin that started to spread over his face.

He told her everything, in explicit detail, as he had ever since High School and Natasha listened intently. Despite this, she still spent the next few hours probing him for more information. Sometimes Bucky thought Natasha should have been an interrogator instead of a dance teacher.

"Natasha, I’ve told you everything already," he said two hours later when he was packing his bag and Natasha was sprawled out on the floor, still asking questions. "What else can I tell you apart from how many freckles he has?"

"He has freckles?" Natasha replied, her face brightening. "Aww, that’s so cute."

The thing is, Bucky probably could have told her about the pale gold dusting of freckles that covered Steve’s fair skin, how they darkened a little when his skin flushed rose with arousal, how they were concentrated just on the bridge of his nose and fanned out across his cheekbones. He didn’t though - there were things about that night that Bucky wanted to save just for himself, so that he could think of them over the next six months.

He smiled at the memory as he pulled his collar up higher and Nat snorted in amusement.

"Colonel Phillips is going to chew you up and spit you out when he sees those," she said, pulling the car up just outside the base.

"It’s totally worth it," Bucky smirked as he unfastened his seat belt.

Natasha’s text alert went off and he left her to read her message as he got his bag out of the back of the car. She was still looking at the screen when he straightened, her face a picture of mischievous delight.

"Is that Sam?" He asked.

Natasha had only been going out with the guy for a couple of months and although Bucky hadn’t yet met him, he could tell she liked him.

"Yeah it is actually," she replied slowly. "He’s just text me with some seriously juicy info - wanna hear it?"

"Sure," Bucky replied.

Natasha leaned casually against the side of the car and smirked.

"Apparently, last night, one Steven Grant Rogers had sex with a Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, and seeing as that soldier is off to Afghanistan in about two hours time, Mr Rogers would like to offer his phone number."

Bucky’s jaw dropped.

"What?" He asked, bewildered. "Steve? How…?"

"Turns out your hook up is my fella’s best buddy," she replied. "We figured that out a week ago."

He gaped at her, his brain slowly catching up with her words and slowly, his smile returned.

"Steve wants my phone number?" He repeated.

"Yeah. Totally looks like you scored, pal!" Natasha replied.

Digging in the car, Natasha unearthed an old receipt and scrawled Steve’s number on it in eyeliner before carefully folding it and placing it in the top pocket of his jacket, which incidentally still held the sketch Steve had done of him the first time they’d hooked up.

"Call him," Natasha said as she hugged him by at the gate. "As soon as you can, call him."

"I will," Bucky told her.

 

He didn’t call right away – he sat on his duffle, surrounded by other soldiers waiting to be shipped out and stared at the number on the scrap of paper in his hands. By the time he’d finally got up the courage to call, it was time to go and Bucky was left hanging onto Steve’s number for the entire flight, cursing himself and vowing to use up his fifteen minute morale call the moment he landed.

Bucky never slept well on flights, especially not in the noisy belly of Army transport planes so he was slightly jetlagged when he disembarked, the glaring sun and hard dirt of Afghanistan welcoming him. Wearily, Bucky made his way to the barracks and found his cot, throwing his bag to the ground and collapsing face first onto the blanket. He was half asleep within ten seconds but didn’t stay that way for long, jolted back into wakefulness by a sharp tap on his foot and a cheerful voice.

“Welcome back, Sarge! We missed ya ‘round here.”

Bucky groaned softly into his pillow before pulling his face free with a great effort, staring at the beaming red-haired corporal.

“Hey, Dugan,” he muttered. “Whas’ goin’ on?”

“Ah, same old stuff,” Tim Dugan replied brightly. “You have a good R&R? Do anything nice? Do any _one_ nice?”

In hindsight, Bucky should have kept his mouth shut, but he hadn’t slept in over twenty four hours and it was hot and dusty and he was hungry and exhausted – he muttered something about meeting a nice guy through Grindr and that Bucky really should call him before he collapsed. He dragged himself from his cot, not noticing that Dugan looked like he’d found the Holy Grail, and made his way out to find a phone from which to make his fifteen minute call.

~

Steve had almost resigned himself to the fact that Bucky wasn’t going to call. He had expected something within the first couple of hours of telling Sam to pass on his number, but time got on and two hours turned into five, and then ten, and then it was the next day and Bucky still hadn’t called.

He tried not to feel too disappointed as he poured himself a bowl of Cap’n Crunch and carried it through to the living room, only to find his phone ringing from where he’d left it on the couch, the thick cushions muffling the sound. Steve almost threw his cereal everywhere as he dived to answer before it rang off.

"Hello?"

"Steve?"

"Bucky!" He replied in relief.

Steve eased himself onto the couch, jamming the phone between his shoulder and ear as he balanced his bowl on his knee.

"I’m sorry it took so long to call," Bucky replied. "I kinda just landed…"

"No, it’s fine," Steve said.

Bucky sounded tired and Steve wondered if he’d slept at all since leaving Steve’s apartment almost two days earlier.

"What’s the time difference over there?"

"Uh…nine hours," said Bucky.

That would have made it five in the afternoon in Afghanistan. Hopefully Bucky could get some sleep soon. Steve almost rolled his eyes at himself for feeling all concerned over a guy he didn’t even know.

"I didn’t wake you, did I?" Asked Bucky, suddenly sounding worried.

"No, I was up. Just having my cereal…"

"Oh yeah?" Bucky replied with a hint of amusement. "What kinda guy are you? Oatmeal? Bran? No wait…granola?"

Steve laughed.

"I hate to disappoint you but I’m nowhere near that sophisticated," Steve said. "It’s Cap’n Crunch."

This time it was Bucky who laughed.

"I could never be disappointed in the Cap’n. He’s been a good friend to me over the years."

Back on his couch, in a small Brooklyn apartment, Steve grinned to himself and stirred his cereal lazily with a finger. He liked this, the way he and Bucky could immediately slip into some form of banter like they’d known each other for years. There were very few people he had such an instant rapport with.

"So, uh, how does this stuff work?" Steve asked.

 ”What stuff?” 

"Keeping in contact with a deployed soldier."

 ”Ah,” Bucky replied. “Well i’m allowed occasional 15 minute calls, but no more than that. I can give you my APO if you want to send stuff in the mail. We have a laptop in our barracks so we can video call if you want, but you might wanna give me a date and time to schedule it - heres my email…” 

"Hang on, let me get a pen," replied Steve, hastily setting aside his cereal as he searched for something to write with.

A moment later he had Bucky’s military email and his APO in case there was something he wanted to send. Steve was pretty sure he could think of something.

"Okay, so…I guess I’ll be in touch?" He said when he had everything written down.

"I’ll look forward to it," Bucky replied. "And Steve?"

"Yeah?"

"I’m really glad you gave me your number."

A grin spread across Steve’s face again as he collapsed back onto the couch.

"I’m glad that our best friends are dating," he replied, "Or this conversation wouldn’t be happening."

Bucky laughed softly.

"Small world isn’t it?"

"Yeah," Steve agreed.

The line was silent for a beat, then he heard Bucky sigh.

"Listen, Steve, my fifteen minutes are almost up, I’m gonna get cut off…"

"Go," Steve told him gently. "Get some sleep."

The line went dead halfway through Bucky’s reply but Steve was still beaming when he put his phone down on the arm of the couch and picked his cereal bowl up again.

This was really happening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I kept changing my mind about what I wanted this chapter to be, and it's gone through three rewrites. I just hope the finished product was okay - I felt like I was losing it a little halfway through.
> 
> Planning on making this a bit of a longfic, so I hope you stay tuned for more chapters.
> 
> Thank you so much for the overwhelming response to the first chapter - it's really given my confidence a boost.


	3. Chapter 3

The ground shimmered in a heat haze over the sun-bleached landscape around Kandahar against a backdrop of the clearest, palest blue. It was still early morning but already Bucky was beginning to sweat as he checked his equipment meticulously, his squad chattering around him as they got ready for patrol. He was much less jet-lagged now that he’d had a damn good night’s sleep, and now he was ready to get back to his job.

Bucky had been pretty glad that all he’d had to do when he’d landed at Kandahar Air Base, was get off the plane and pretty much collapse onto his cot. As soon as he’d finished his call to Steve, Bucky had gone straight to sleep with the background noise of the other guys clattering around. It hadn’t even disturbed him in the slightest.

He did hate the fact that it was so hot out and that he’d have to spend the day in flack, lying on his belly in the burning sun with sweat pooling underneath his helmet and trickling down into his eyes. Bucky screwed up his face at the very thought, just as someone called his name.

“Hey Sarge?” 

Bucky looked up and smiled at Private Gabriel Jones who was sitting on the edge of his own cot, lacing up his boots.

“Yeah?”

“How’d your R&R go? You kinda went straight to sleep when you got back, so I never got to ask last night.”

Bucky opened his mouth to tell Jones that his R&R had been quite pleasant, thank you very much, but to his horror, he was interrupted by Dugan before he could get a word out.

“Didn’t Sarge tell you?” Dugan said cheerfully. “He met somebody. Using that hook up app that’s popular with the kids these days.”

“Can it, Dum-Dum!” Bucky warned his corporal, seriously regretting spilling the beans the night before whilst in his exhausted and jet-lagged state.

“Hey, you got laid, Sarge! You should celebrate that!”

“Celebrate what?” asked somebody with a cool, clipped English accent.

Leaning against the doorjamb was Falsworth, a former British Red Devil-turned-contractor who now worked with NATO in counter-terrorism. Bucky’s squad had sort of absorbed him and claimed him as one of their own, along with a crazy little French guy called Dernier who was an expert in explosives. They all hung out together during down time.

“Nothing,” Bucky told him, turning back to his equipment.

Dugan however, was not to be deterred.

“Sarge got laid by some hottie back home in the States!”

“Dugan!”

“Really, Barnes?” replied Falsworth, his face brightening as he crossed his arms over his chest and crossed his ankles in the doorway. “Well that is spectacular news indeed!”

“I thought Sarge didn’t do hook-ups,” chimed in Jim Morita from his corner of the room.

“I don’t...” Bucky attempted to say.

“But it was obviously worth it – have you seen the hickeys?”

“Oh, Christ...” muttered Bucky as they all descended on him, hands pulling his shirt collar down for a glimpse of the yellowing purpleish marks on his neck and throat and the yells of delight.

“So do we get any details, Sarge?”

“Yeah! Height, hair colour, eye colour?”

Bucky batted away their hands and pulled his collar back up, frowning at them.

“How about you all mind your fuckin’ business?” He retorted.

“Aw c’mon, Sarge!”

“Yeah, just help us out with a couple’a details.”

Bucky sighed and shook his head in disbelief.

“Fine. Blond, blue eyes, small. That’s all you get.”

“And obviously a total firecracker in the sack!” Dugan added with a grin.

The other guys cackled with glee as Bucky picked up his flak vest and hefted it on.

“Alright, you’ve all had your fun, now shut the fuck up because we’re about to go handle some live ammo and I need you guys concentrating on that instead of my sex life.”   
“Yes Sergeant,” they chorused, and each turned back to their equipment, all still grinning.

Bucky pinched the bridge of his nose between his fore-finger and thumb, and regretted ever opening his stupid fat mouth to Timothy Dugan.

~

Steve’s chest was tight and he was dripping head-to-toe with sweat as he tried to keep pace with Sam Wilson. Not for the first time, Steve was reminded why a flat-footed asthmatic with heart arrhythmias should not go jogging, but he sucked up the pain and ploughed through it anyway. Besides, he’d already done three miles, so it couldn’t be too far off the end, could it?

“How are you managing there, Stevie?” Sam asked, jogging casually and barely out of breath on Steve’s right.

“Uh...feeling like I want to strangle you for dragging me out on this ‘short jog’, Sam. Thanks for asking!”

His friend laughed.

“You tellin’ me you can’t handle it Rogers?”

“I never said that,” Steve puffed.

He probably would have dropped down dead before admitting that he might have bitten off more than he could chew with trying to keep up with Sam. Thankfully, he was saved from having to run much further when they spotted a beautiful red-haired woman walking down the street towards them and Sam slowed almost to a stop, his face spreading into its familiar, trademark, Prince Charming grin.

“Well, aint you a sight for sore eyes?” he called out to the woman, who smirked at him.

“Can it, Wilson,” she replied. “You think you’re so charming, but you should see how you look right now!”

Sam laughed again as they stopped, finally, right in front of her. Steve immediately leaned against the nearest wall, leaning over with his hands on his knees as he tried to get his breathing under control.

“Steve,” Sam said, gesturing to the woman, “This is my girlfriend, Natasha Romanoff. Natasha, this is Steve Rogers.”

Steve raised his head to look at her. Natasha was very petite – a couple of inches smaller than Steve and slim with copper-coloured hair and green eyes. She looked like a model, and if it wasn’t for the mischievous glint in her eyes and the smirk on her face, Steve would have been wary of coming within a mile of her.

“Hey, Steve!” she drawled. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”

“You too,” he panted. “Forgive me for not shaking your hand – I’m all sweaty and disgusting.”

Natasha grinned widely and gave Sam’s arm a playful smack.

“What kind of friend are you, Wilson? Dragging the guy around like this?”

“Hey, I’m taking an interest in Steve’s fitness, alright?”

“Determined to kill me, more like,” Steve muttered.

Sam snorted.

“Does that mean that you don’t wanna do another mile or two?”

Steve shook his head. It wasn’t very often that he knew when to quit, but decided that this might be one of those times when he did.

“You go on. I’ll just...die here.”

“Well,” Natasha cut in. “Why doesn’t Sam finish his jog and I can buy Steve a coffee or something while we wait?”

Sam and Steve both looked at her, eyebrows raised. Steve supposed it was a good idea – it’s not like he was able to run any further than what he already had, and while he was recovering he might as well get to know his best friend’s girlfriend, especially as she was also a friend of Bucky’s. She might be able to give him some pointers about what he could possibly send to Afghanistan.

“Sounds good to me,” he replied.

Five minutes later found Steve sitting on a bench in the park, gulping down a bottle of peach iced tea while Natasha sat next to him, her hands wrapped gracefully around a steaming latte. Steve did wish that he could have met her when he looked better than he currently did, like perhaps after a shower and his skinny chicken legs weren’t on show in the only shorts he owned. Lord only knew how much of a mess he looked. Well, the Lord and Natasha.

“I mean it when I say that it’s nice to finally meet you, Steve,” Natasha said with a small smile. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”

“Yeah?” Steve asked, casting her a sideways glance. “Does Sam talk about me that much?”

Natasha’s smile turned into a smirk.

“Well, he does a little. James on the other hand...”

It took Steve a second to realise that she meant Bucky. He could feel his ears turn pink.

“Ah...” he replied.

She laughed at him.

“Oh, don’t freak out on me. It was all good things, I swear.”

Steve ducked his head to hide his flush. It wasn’t as though he and Bucky had talked in depth at either of their meetings – they’d spent pretty much the whole time with each other being completely naked and most of the conversation had been dirty talk. He could only imagine the kind of things that he might have told Natasha.

He took another sip of his tea just as Natasha nudged his shoulder gently with hers.

“He was really thrilled that you gave him your phone number, you know.”

“Really?” Steve asked with a half-smile.

“Yeah! He called you, right?”

Steve nodded.

“Yeah, he called as soon as he got to Afghanistan.”

Bucky had honestly sounded exhausted but Steve had still felt elated to hear his voice on the other end of the phone. It was strange how he’d recognised it immediately. Even stranger was that peculiar squishy feeling in his belly when he’d heard it.

Steve Rogers was no romantic. At least, he’d never considered himself to be a romantic and his track record kind of proved it. It had been apparent ever since he’d hit puberty and never grown another inch or put on an ounce of weight that he was never going to be the ugly duckling who grew into the beautiful swan. Steve was going to stay scrawny and short for the rest of his life, always going to be overlooked, always passed over for somebody more appealing. He thanked his lucky stars for the invention of Grindr.

He’d never expected to find any kind of romantic connection through the damn thing, but at least when people send him messages and turned up on his doorstep, more than willing to fuck him, Steve at least felt wanted even if it was only for an hour.

He just couldn’t get over how it had been immediately different with Bucky. Not just a quick, nameless fuck, but somebody who Steve had connected with. He knew it sounded cheesy and bordered on the ridiculous, but Steve had been happy to put himself out there, emotionally, for possibly the first time in his life. He wasn’t expecting much, he just wanted the chance to keep this feeling around for as long as possible – the feeling that he could just maybe have something...more.

“He gave me a whole bunch of communication methods,” Steve continued. “I don’t even know where to start.”

Natasha blew gently across the surface of her coffee.

“Well, I’m telling you now that if you want to talk to him, it’s best to arrange a video call, probably sometime in the evening – his evening, that is. It’s nine hours difference between here and there, so eight or nine am is your best bet.”

Steve nodded.

“That’s fair enough. He said to email with a date and time...”

“Yeah, the boys have a laptop in their barracks but it’s shared. You might find somebody else picking up your video calls at some point but its okay – they’re all nice enough guys.”

Steve nodded again and took another small sip of his tea.

“I take it you do this a lot,” he said.

 

Natasha smiled and sat back on the bench, crossing one slim leg over the other.  
“I’ve been video calling James ever since he joined the Army. Sometimes I send him crap – chocolate, candy and cigarettes are usually appreciated by everybody.”

Steve grinned.

“I’ll bear that in mind if I ever send him anything,” he replied. 

He watched Natasha take a sip of her coffee as she looked at him from the corner of her eye. 

“James is a good guy, you know,” she said as she lowered the cup. “I think it’s really nice that you guys are keeping in touch.”

“You know what?” Steve said, smiling at her. “So am I.”

~

It was a week before they managed to set up their first video call. Steve and Bucky had exchanged a few emails, attempting to whittle down a good date and time for them both that fit around the problem of six grown men sharing one laptop, but eventually they had settled on a Wednesday. 

Bucky had managed to find out that Steve worked a lot from home, and so they didn’t have to dance around a regular work day in order to talk. However, he had picked the evening where he was most likely to have the barracks to himself on account of his squad heading on out to some card game or other. He could talk to Steve in peace.

As hard as he tried, he couldn’t really conceal his good mood come Wednesday morning. Even eight hours in full combat gear under the baking hot sun couldn’t dampen it. Bucky had been in high spirits as he’d taken a shower and put on clean clothes before running a little product through his hair to make it look presentable and ignored the sniggers from his squad as he whistled a tune.

At 5pm exactly, he was sitting in front of the laptop, the barracks empty and silent around him, waiting for Steve to call. Bucky felt the same mixture of nerves and excitement that he’d felt the first time he’d gone to Steve’s apartment and seen him for the first time – small and skinny, but then Bucky had liked that, and Steve’s eyes were so big and bright, his hands so confident, his skin so fucking smooth. 

He’d found Steve physically attractive of course, but it was his personality that had sealed the deal for Bucky – he had immediately worked to put Bucky at ease, had expressed no interest in pushing boundaries, and the banter between them...they hadn’t talked long, but Bucky remembered how easy they had bounced off of each other, like they’d known each other for years. You didn’t get a connection like that very often in life and it would have been a huge waste to just let it go.

Bucky almost jumped out of his skin when the screen on the laptop changed and the sound came blasting from the narrow speakers, all shrill and tinny. Swiftly, Bucky ran a hand over his hair to check that it was all still in place, and picked up the video call. His heart nearly stopped when Steve’s face appeared, beaming at him.

“Hey!” Steve said.

“Hey...” Bucky managed to reply.

He recognised Steve’s living room and couch, even though it was much brighter in daylight. The laptop was on the coffee table, and Steve was sitting curled up on his couch, cradling a coffee cup with a sketchbook balanced on his knees. He looked damn gorgeous ; shower-fresh and casual, like video calling Bucky in Afghanistan was just one of those things he did every day. Bucky’s stomach was feeling a little fuzzy.

“How you doin’?” Steve asked.

Bucky watched him take a sip of his coffee, full lips parting around the rim of the mug, and he had to take a deep breath before answering.

“Yeah, I’m good. It’s...y’know...Afghanistan, but it’s all okay.”

Steve smiled.

“Where about in Afghanistan are you anyway?” he asked. “I mean, providing that you’re allowed to tell me, that is. You’re not in one of those places that’s not supposed to exist, right?”

Bucky couldn’t help but laugh.

“Nah, I’m stationed at Kandahar Airport in the south,” Bucky replied. “It’s a joint operations base; lots of people, lots of flights, mostly taken over by NATO and the Air Force, but there’s a few of us Army guys still here.”

Steve’s fair eyebrows shot up.

“I don't really understand what a lot of that actually means,” he replied with a smirk.

“Sorry,” Bucky said. “A lot of shit that comes out of the mouth of military personnel makes no sense to civilians. We talk a lot of crap.”

Steve laughed again. 

“That’s okay, I’m sure it’ll make sense to me eventually,” he countered. “Honestly, I don’t much follow what’s going on out there.”

“Most people don’t,” replied Bucky with a shrug and a smile.

By rights, Bucky technically shouldn’t have been in Afghanistan at all. The US had officially withdrawn the Army by this point, leaving a couple of Air Force and Marines bases dotted about, but here in Joint Operations territory, a few units of Infantry remained to patrol the parameter and stop the non-military personnel from getting themselves killed. 

“What’s the weather like over there?” Steve asked, grinning at him from over the rim of his coffee cup.

“It’s hot,” Bucky replied. “Which would be awesome if I was anywhere near a beach, but nope, it’s all dirt and rocks as far as the eye can see.”

“Sounds picturesque,” Steve said dryly.

“Oh, you have no idea,” replied Bucky with a short laugh. “Everything is the same shade of beige. The scenery, the sky, the Humvees, the uniforms...”

“Honestly?”

“It’s true! Pilots absolutely hate landing at Kandahar because the airport is so difficult to discern from its surroundings. It’s the most camouflaged air base in the country!”

Steve laughed, shaking his head gently before taking another sip of his coffee. 

It wasn’t quite as awkward for a first real conversation as Bucky had initially thought it would be. In truth, he’d not really had any idea how this would go; it was entirely new territory for Bucky, and he was doing this whole thing backwards. He already knew what Steve looked like naked, already knew what that body felt like pressed against his, already knew and loved the way that Steve kissed, and only now was he finding out what Steve was really like, and he was doing it from the other side of the world. Bucky was just glad that it was all pretty easy.

“So,” he said, sitting back in the uncomfortable plastic chair. “You gonna get up to much today?”

“Hmm,” mused Steve over another sip of coffee. “Not greatly. Got some work to do. Have to pay the bills somehow

“I saw you had your sketchbook out – I thought it might have been for me.”

Steve’s fair eyebrows arched upwards, the corner of his mouth curling up.

“Aha, I see how it is!” Steve replied.

Smirking, Bucky sat back in his chair and stretched gently, his t-shirt lifting a little at the bottom to show Steve a sliver of belly. The blond bit his lower lip in response.

“Are you gonna draw me like one of your French girls, Steve?” Bucky asked coyly.

Steve laughed again.

“You gotta be naked for that remember, Kate Winslet?”

“Well, I could probably take my shirt off for ya...” replied Bucky.

On the laptop screen, Bucky saw Steve’s blue eyes get wider and a little darker as he licked his lips once.

“Do it.”

Bucky bit his lip as he grinned. He remembered the first time he’d done this, on his knees in Steve’s living room with that gorgeous blond looking at him as though Bucky was made of chocolate and Steve wanted to take a big old bite. Bucky had been a little nervous, but god he’d loved the way Steve’s eyes had roamed all over his body and Bucky had definitely wanted to give him more to look at.

Grasping the hem of his t-shirt, he pulled it up and over his head.

“Damn, that really is a sight...” Steve mused quietly, leaning over to the coffee table to set down his cup and pick up a pencil.

Bucky laughed and shook his head, watching as Steve grinned and began his sketch.

“Yeah yeah, stop tryin’ to flatter me and get on with it.”

He felt remarkably comfortable posing shirtless whilst Steve drew him. The small blond grinned and got to work immediately, his gorgeous slender hands gripping the pencil lightly and making short, deft movements across the blank page of the sketch book.

Bucky found he could probably watch Steve draw for hours. He seemed completely absorbed in it, blue eyes flickering up from the sketchbook and back, blond hair falling forwards onto his forehead, tongue out just a tiny bit and resting on his top lip. Steve only broke out of it to talk sporadically.

“I think this is my first piece of art done through the medium of webcam.”

“Are you tellin’ me that’s not a module in Art School?” Bucky joked.

“Surprisingly no,” replied Steve with a smile.

“Well, it shoulda been.” Said Bucky, grinning. “I dunno, what are you paying money for if they don’t teach you how draw random soldiers deployed oversees.”

Steve laughed again. He really was beautiful when he did that, blue eyes crinkling at the corners.

“So, how long have you been in the Army?” Steve asked him as he paused his sketch in order to smudge it with his little finger.

“Uh...six years.”

“Wow!”

“Yeah, I know,” replied Bucky, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand. “I joined up when I was nineteen after I dropped out of college. It was four years at first, and then when that finished I had no idea what else I would do if I wasn’t here. So I signed on for another two until I could figure out what else I could possibly do with my life.”

“What did you study in college?”

“Modern languages.”

Steve looked at him properly from over his paper.

“You not like it?” he asked.

Bucky sighed softly.

“The language part, I absolutely loved. I like learning, it’s just that college was way too stressful. It wasn’t the right place for me at that time of my life, I think. But I picked up enough to be of some use over here.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, I mean, I picked up a bit of Russian which is helpful at times.”

Steve looked up from his sketch again, realisation dawning.

“Afghanistan, right. The Russians occupied Afghanistan for a while.”

“Exactly. It’s mostly the older people who speak a bit of Russian, but since most don’t speak English and a lot of us don’t speak Pashtu, it’s nice to be able to communicate in something that isn’t yelling and wild hand gestures.”

Steve chuckled.

“It sounds like an interesting life.”

“It can be,” admitted Bucky. “I mean it’s dangerous, and it can be hard living away from family and friends, but...I’m with a great bunch of guys and I’ve been everywhere. I don’t think I would ever have travelled beyond New York if I hadn’t joined the army.”

Steve gave him a soft smile.

“Yeah, I’d love to travel but I’m mostly confined to Brooklyn,” he said.

“Why’s that?” asked Bucky. “You work too much?”

Steve huffed gently.

“Can’t afford it. Medical bills are too high to have the spare cash lying around.”

Bucky made a face.

“Shit, that sucks,” he replied.

That was one of the best things about being in the military – all of his medical needs and requirements were taken care of, from cold medication to major surgery, and would be until the day he left service. 

“Nah, it’s okay,” Steve said with a smile and a small shrug. “I’ll get there someday. At least I get to do a job I enjoy and I don’t have to get all dressed up to do it. I like working from home.”

“And yet you’ve still not done a live sketch over webcam.”

“Well, there’s a first time for everything!”

Steve laughed at him, his eyes lowering once again to his sketchbook. This was easy, Bucky thought. Much easier than it should be considering they were practically strangers.  
He shifted in his seat and smiled at the blond on his laptop.

“I gotta say, Steve, I kinda like being your life drawing model.”

Steve grinned, still sketching.

“Awesome. I kinda like it too. You can take your clothes off for me anytime.”

Bucky laughed, feeling his cheeks begin to warm.

“Yeah well, I’ve done that before.”

“Yup.” Steve mused, his fingers slowing to a stop as he smirked at Bucky over his sketchbook. “Y’know, I wouldn’t mind if you did that again. Like...now.”

Bucky’s mouth dropped and he laughed in surprise.

“Steve...I don’t think that’s a good idea. The rest of the guys...they’re only down the hall, they could come in at any minute.”

“Aw, c’mon Bucky,” replied Steve, grinning at him mischievously. “Pop a couple of buttons there. Just show me the tip.”

“Oh my god...” laughed Bucky.

“It’s not like you’re completely naked or anything. It’s just the tip, it doesn’t really count.”

Bucky was still laughing, feeling his head shake slowly but Steve was watching him playfully, his smile a mask of mock innocence, his eyes daring Bucky to do it. It was a dumb idea, but Bucky’s hands went to the front of his pants anyway, fingers unfastening the top button, and then the middle...

“Holy crap, I think we might have just interrupted Sarge’s live webcam sex show!” boomed Dugan from the doorway.

Bucky looked up, his hands still in the process of unbuttoning his pants, to find them all standing there in the doorway – Dugan, Morita, Jones, and even Falsworth and Dernier, all grinning at him like they’d planned it.

“Fuck!”

On the screen in front of him Steve burst out laughing, blond hair falling into his blue eyes as he doubled over in mirth, grabbing his sides as Bucky hurriedly fastened his pants up enough to recover some dignity. The guys swarmed into the room, crowding around the laptop and peering at the screen. Bucky seriously wished that he hadn’t told them a thing.

“Well, hey there!” Dugan said to Steve, beaming at the screen.

“Hi,” replied Steve, shoulders still shaking with laughter.

Bucky reached for his t-shirt that he’d dropped on the floor and sighed gently as he shrugged it on, feeling his cheeks heat up. At least they hadn’t caught him with his pants actually down, because he knew for a fact that he would have done it for Steve. He absolutely loved the way Steve looked at him when he stripped bare.

“Guys, this is Steve. Steve...meet the Howling Commandos.”

“Hi Steve!” they all chorused.

“Hold on,” objected a confused Morita, scratching his head. “It’s a guy?”

Bucky wasn’t sure he could turn any redder, because now Steve definitely knew that Bucky had talked to his squad about him, that Steve had been a subject of discussion, and Bucky was terribly embarrassed. Steve’s response however, surprised them all.

“Do I look like I got a set’a tits or somethin’?” Steve replied, his Brooklyn accent laid on thick as he blinked innocently at them all.

Morita’s jaw hit the ground whilst Dugan roared with laughter.

“Wow, Sarge,” his corporal guffawed. “Please tell me you’re keeping this one. I like his spark.”

Bucky bit his lip to hide his grin, and when his eyes locked with Steve’s, the blond was trying to hide his own.

“I’m sorry,” Morita said with a shrug. “He said small, blonde, blue eyes and I kinda...forgot...”

“You’re a ninny,” Falsworth told him fondly, knocking the cap from Morita’s head.

“Yeah, Don’t Ask Don’t Tell has been repealed for years now!” Jones chimed in with a chuckle.

Bucky shook his head and leaned forward, rising out of his chair slightly to try and block the others from view.

“Sorry about these guys, Steve. They’re assholes. It’s kind of requirement that you have to be at least some percentage of an asshole to be in the military. Dugan is like, ninety percent asshole...he’s like, the King Asshole whereas Jones is only maybe five percent.”

“What percentage of asshole are you?” asked Steve with a grin.

“Probably about twelve percent,” Bucky replied.

“That’s not too bad,” Steve said, finally setting aside his sketch book and pencil. “I mean, I’ve met much bigger assholes – at least your assholery is pretty tiny.”

“I’m pretty sure the context of this conversation has shifted somewhat...” murmured Falsworth.

His comment caused Dugan to guffaw once again and Bucky, who had just felt the heat in his cheeks begin to dissipate, started to grow red again. Steve just grinned innocently at him.

“So why are they called the Howling Commandos?” he asked, thankfully shifting the conversation.

Before Bucky could respond, Dugan was behind him.

“Let me give you a demonstration kid!”

Fast as a bullet, Dugan grabbed the loose waistband of Bucky’s pants and yanked hard, pulling them down almost to Bucky’s knees whilst yelling a loud ‘WAHOO!’ Bucky wasn’t quite quick enough to recover his dignity before Steve managed to get a good eyeful of his ass. He didn’t particularly mind that too much.

“Fuck you, Dugan, you fucking fuck!” Bucky cursed, but he was laughing, as was Steve, almost creased double on his couch back in Brooklyn, almost wheezing with the intensity of it.

Around him, the Howlers shook their heads and chuckled. In most squads, nobody would have dared do that to their sergeant, but Bucky and his guys had an interesting dynamic. Over the years, they had been through everything together and they honestly respected each other and trusted each other with their lives. Once they were out of the barracks, the jokes stopped and Bucky was their sergeant – they would never have dreamed of crossing the line. 

Once they had all calmed down, Bucky got to introducing them all individually – Dugan first, then Jones, and Dernier...

“Hey Steve? Y’know when we first met and you asked about my name?”

“Yeah...” replied Steve with a raised eyebrow.

“I told you that everybody and their brother is called James, right? Well, here’s proof – there’s three of us in the same room right now – James Barnes, James Morita, James Falsworth.”

“We’re thinking of starting a boy band,” Falsworth chipped in cheerily. “J3.”

Steve laughed.

“I think it could work,” the blond replied. “Providing you can all sing, of course.”

“Hey, that’s what autotune is for,” Bucky joked, settling back down in the uncomfortable plastic chair.

Bucky could barely move now, crowded in by his squad who were all grinning and waving at Steve on the screen. It hadn’t been awkward before now, but with the guys around Bucky couldn’t figure out what to say. He didn’t want them listening into his conversation with Steve, at least not this time, but telling five men to leave the room was easier said than done.

Steve however seemed to feel exactly the same as Bucky did and he shifted on the couch, clearing his throat gently.

"Well...I guess I'd better...."

He tapped his sketchbook and indicated to a room out of the view of the webcam.

"Right, yeah,” Bucky replied, understanding completely. “Yeah, me too..."

Steve grinned at him.

"Cool, so....I guess...I'll talk to you later?"

"Yeah! Yeah, definitely. This was good, we should definitely do it again..." he said enthusiastically, instantly regretting it.

He sounded way too desperate, and Steve was bound to think he was a total moron. Thankfully, Steve continued to smile happily at him.

"Bye Steeeeeeeve!" the Howlers all chirped cheerfully.

Steve chuckled and waved at them all.

“Bye guys. Bye Bucky.”

Bucky watched him lean forward towards the laptop and then the screen went blank. Dugan gave Bucky's shoulder a hearty clap and beamed at him.

"I like that kid, Sarge. He's a corker."

"Yeah," Bucky sighed as the Howlers all moved away to their own bunks. "Yeah, he is."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again to the people who are very patient with me bombarding them with plot at various points of the day, all week long. Also, thank you for the help figuring out where the hell to put Bucky in Afghanistan - the military insight was helpful!


	4. Chapter 4

Talking to Bucky came to be the highlight of Steve’s week. They exchanged a few short emails on a day-to-day basis, navigating around the nine hour time difference, and managed to video call once a week, sometimes twice if they were lucky. Their calls were often gate crashed by the Howling Commandos but Steve didn’t mind – those guys were hilarious and it was obvious that they all adored their Sergeant and really liked Steve. He got to know bits about them all, and best of all, he learned a lot about Bucky.

The Army Sergeant had largely grown up with his mother’s family after being kicked out at fifteen by his Irish Catholic father who had taken great offence to the fact that Bucky was highly unlikely to settle down and marry a good Catholic girl who would give him lots of babies. His mother’s family was large, Jewish, and apparently had a desire to feed everybody that came to call. They were also very supportive of Bucky and his only sibling, his younger sister Rebecca. 

Steve couldn’t imagine being rejected like that by a parent. His mother Sarah was also of the Irish Catholic brand – an immigrant who came over as a child in the 1960s – but she was the sweetest, most loving, caring, and understanding woman the world had ever produced. He didn’t have a large and extensive family, but he didn’t need one when Sarah Rogers was all he really needed.

All the same, he hadn’t told her yet about meeting Bucky. 

Steve was pretty sure that his mother knew exactly how his personal life was, even though she never mentioned it. Steve had never brought anybody home to meet her because he’d never had any romantic attachment to anyone – it had all been about hook ups, which were, admittedly, not happening very often these days.

He didn’t quite know what was happening to him. Bucky wasn’t his boyfriend. This thing they had was...different...it was vague and non-committal, even though it was definitely something. Steve was well aware that he didn’t owe anybody anything, but he found himself ignoring a lot of messages on Grindr, and those he did pick up on days where he felt particularly horny, he ended up cancelling at the last minute and shut himself in the bedroom for a long while with Pornhub and his right hand instead.

Steve told himself that it wasn’t a big deal. He liked Bucky, that was all, and his tastes may have been changing. Maybe he was just maturing and growing out of his hook up phase and it had nothing to do with Bucky at all, but he still couldn’t quite get rid of the butterflies that fluttered around his belly on days where he would see Bucky’s face, gorgeous and grinning at him from the laptop screen.

It was one such day that Steve found himself going for dinner with Sam and Natasha at his favourite diner around the corner from his apartment. He’d spent the whole day unable to concentrate, because whereas they usually scheduled their video calls for when Steve got up in the morning, this time they’d had to schedule for early morning in Afghanistan as Bucky had been unable to make their usual time. Steve had to be home and in front of his laptop by 9pm, which left plenty of time for cheeseburgers, chilli fries, and beer.

Natasha was hilarious and Steve liked her immensely. At first, she’d been a little hard to figure out – she was nice enough but seemed to be very emotionally guarded. Once they were past that though, he found her to have a quick, dry wit and a fierce intelligence, plus a wickedly mischievous side that Steve was in awe of. Plus, she could drink anyone under the table, which had been the source of a good few evenings’ entertainment with local frat boys in bars.

Steve wasn’t entirely sure if he was hungry or nervous, his stomach all squirmy as he picked at his chilli fries. Normally, Steve could pretty much eat his entire body weight in food, but he also never had to go a whole day thinking about his video call with Bucky. He kept looking at the time on his phone while Natasha attempted to distract him with conversation.

“So, have you sent anything over yet?” she asked, snaking a fry through the pool of ketchup on her plate.

Steve looked up and took a deep breath.

“Yeah, I sent a couple of things. I found some totally fun postcards over at Coney Island the other week – I thought they might make him laugh.”

“Did you send him that sketch you did of me?”

“I did!” Steve replied, smiling.

It had probably been one of his best graphite sketches – Natasha with her head bent over a book in the sunny window of Steve’s apartment. He’d drawn it on a Saturday afternoon when Sam had been absorbed in watching the baseball, and Natasha had curled up on Steve’s window seat with one of the books from his shelves. She’d been an absolute pleasure to draw, and he’d known immediately that Bucky would love it.

“You’ll have to do another one sometime and give it to me,” groused Sam as he picked up his beer bottle. “I might actually want to have a gorgeous drawing of my beautiful girlfriend.”

“Aww, you jealous sweetie?” Natasha asked, grinning as she affectionately rubbed the back of Sam’s head.

Steve chuckled.

“I’m happy to draw Natasha any time she wants, so I’m pretty sure you’ll get another chance to own one.”

Sam opened his mouth to reply, but was interrupted by the sound of a ketchup bottle being smashed on the ground. Almost everyone in the diner turned to look in the direction of the ruckus, and Steve frowned when his eyes settled on a rather harassed-looking girl with short dark hair, frantically trying to mop up ketchup with paper napkins as a man whom Steve presumed to be her boyfriend glowered at her.

“For god’s sake,” the man was saying to her. “You’re so fuckin’ stupid! How’d you manage to drop a whole fuckin’ bottle a’ ketchup all over the fuckin’ place?”

“Sorry...sorry...” the girl was muttering.

“Jesus,” continued the man, a look of pure disgust on his face as he continued to watch her. “Clumsy fuckin’ bitch. I don’t even know why I’m with you...”

“HEY!” Steve said loudly, getting to his feet.

Immediately, Sam went to grab Steve’s shirt sleeve and missed.

“Leave it alone,” Sam hissed, but Steve ignored him.

Stepping out of the booth, Steve glared at the guy who had ceased berating the girl for knocking over the ketchup bottle and was now sizing up all five-foot-five and ninety pounds of Steve Rogers.

“You got a problem?” the man asked, raising his voice.

“Yeah, your attitude,” Steve replied. “It stinks. The girl knocked over a ketchup bottle. It happens, there’s no need to be such a fuckin’ dick about it.”

The guy bristled visibly and Steve stood his ground as the guy got to his feet. From the other side of his table, Steve heard Sam tell him to sit his ass back down, but Steve pretended he hadn’t heard. The entire diner was watching them now.

“What the fuck you say to me, you skinny little runt?”

“You need me to repeat it? Are you deaf as well as mean, ugly and stupid?”

The words were out of Steve’s mouth before he’d even thought about saying them. Seconds later, his smart mouth got a fist square in the middle of it.

Steve Rogers had been in enough fist fights over the course of his life to know immediately when his lip was split. Pain shot through the lower half of his face as his head was knocked so violently to the side, he felt it crack. He tasted blood in his mouth and his eyes were watering. 

People started yelling as Steve dragged the back of his left hand across his mouth, smearing red over his chin. He saw Sam and Natasha get to their feet, their outlines hazy as he squared off against the guy again.

“You gonna take that back?” the guy asked him.

Steve huffed out a single, harsh laugh.

“Fuck no,” he replied. “If anything, you just proved my point – you’re definitely an asshole.”

He was too disoriented to dodge the second punch that landed high up on his cheek and sent him spinning. Steve lost his balance and crashed into a table, hitting his head hard on the corner.

The last thing he saw before he vision went black, was Natasha placing a well-aimed kick to the guy’s groin.

~

“I’m fine,” Steve said with a sigh when faced with Bucky’s horrified look.

“What the hell happened?”

“He got punched in the face,” Sam replied on Steve’s behalf, coming out of Steve’s bathroom with a dish of water and a handful of surgical cotton.

Steve groaned as Bucky’s face fell.

“He what?”

“Oh James, you should have seen it,” Natasha chipped in, leaning over the back of the couch to gently squeeze Steve’s shoulders. “The guy was twice his size. Steve is a fucking hero!”

Steve ducked his head to hide the smile that began spreading across his face as Sam frowned at him.

“Stop encouraging him Natasha. He’s going to get himself seriously hurt one day.”

“One day?” Bucky piped up from the laptop. “You mean you get beat up often?”

“No!” Steve protested, wincing as Sam dabbed at his lip with wet cotton. 

“He’s lying,” Sam cut in. “He does it a lot.”

Bucky groaned and put his face in his hands. Steve looked at his feet.

“Alright,” sighed Bucky. “Is anybody actually going to explain to me what happened?”

Between them, Steve, Natasha and Sam told Bucky the whole tale of the dickwad in the diner. Steve had never seen Bucky look so serious, his grey-blue eyes shifting to each of them as they talked, his brow furrowed slightly. Steve actually thought it was adorable that Bucky was concerned.

“Okay, the guy was a serious asshole and I probably would have punched him too,” Bucky said by the end.

Steve sat back on the couch, taking a bag of frozen peas from Natasha and placing them against the bump at his temple.

“Well actually, I didn’t exactly get a punch in,” he admitted sheepishly.

“Oh God...” Bucky muttered.

“He didn’t even try,” Sam told him with a sigh.

“Why does that even matter?” asked Natasha, giving Steve’s hair an affectionate ruffle. “He stood up for somebody who couldn’t stand up for themselves. It think it’s heroic.”

Steve beamed at her, wincing slightly as the cut on his lip stretched and started to bleed again.

“Heroic, but pretty stupid,” Bucky replied.

“Thanks,” Steve said dryly.

Bucky started to laugh and Steve couldn’t help grinning in response.

“Oh c’mon Steve, you gotta admit – squaring off against a guy twice your size and getting knocked out cold.”

“Yeah, yeah...”

“What possessed you to do it?”

“I just don’t like bullies,” Steve replied with a shrug. “Somebody has to stand up to ‘em.”

Sam gave his shoulder a gentle nudge.

“It doesn’t always have to be you though,” he said.

“I agree with Sam,” Bucky added.

Steve laughed.

“Why do you even care?”

“Because I do, idiot!”

Steve clamped his mouth shut and ignored the look that passed between Sam and Natasha, who quickly slunk off to hide in his kitchen. Bucky watched them leave before running a hand through his hair and leaning back in his chair with a small sigh.

“Look, Steve...I like you. You gotta know that by now, okay? We’ve been talking for three months now – these video calls are like, the highlight of my fucking week. I nearly had a heart attack today when I saw your face was all bloody – I was so fuckin’ worried. I care, okay. I care what happens to you, I care if somebody hurts you.”

Steve looked at the floor as he turned his bag of frozen peas over to the cold side.

“I’m fine, Buck...”

“Yeah, this time,” Bucky replied. “Sam says this happens to you a lot.”

“He’s exaggerating,” argued Steve. “I don’t actually just go out looking for fights. I don’t prowl around the streets looking for somebody to fuck my shit up.”

Bucky snorted and shook his head, grinning.

“I never said that.”

“I know,” Steve said. “I just can’t stand to see people being abused and others just standing by like it has nothing to do with them. I’m not that person, Bucky. I can’t just sit there and let it go over my head, y’know?”

Bucky looked at him thoughtfully.

“All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.”

Steve smiled at him.

“Edmund Burke,” he murmured.

Bucky sighed and shook his head again.

“Fine,” Bucky replied. “I get your point. Just be careful, okay? I don’t know what I’d do if something really bad happened to you and I’m stuck all the way over here.”

Steve grinned.

“I promise, I won’t get into any unnecessary altercations,” he agreed.

“Okay,” replied Bucky. “Make sure that they don’t leave you alone tonight, yeah? You could have a concussion.”

“Yes, Sergeant,” Steve replied with a salute.

Two minutes later, Bucky had signed off and Steve was left sitting there with a dopey grin on his face. Bucky _liked_ him. He gave a crap, and there were precious few people in Steve’s life who’d ever done that. He wasn’t entirely sure what to make of it, but he liked it. Sighing, he looked at his kitchen door, which was only partially closed.

“Alright, you can come out now,” he called.

Sam’s head popped around the door, a toothy grin plastered across his face.

“Yeah? We’re not disturbing your heart-to-heart with your boyfriend?”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” murmured Steve, feeling his cheeks grow warm.

“Yeah yeah, dude. Whatever you say.”

Natasha nudged Sam in the ribs and he ducked back into the kitchen, chuckling to himself as Natasha came out to check the bruise on the side of his head.  
Bucky wasn’t his boyfriend. Steve didn’t do boyfriends, but Christ, he could not get rid of the warm fuzzy feeling in his belly every time he thought about Bucky saying that he cared. 

~

Bucky hadn’t expected the phone call from Steve at ten o’clock in the morning, because that meant it was the middle of the night back in New York. 

When they had first been deployed, the Howling Commandos had pooled a bit of money together to buy a GSM cell phone that they could share. It was expensive to call out, but family and friends could get an international call card for cheap enough back home and call them back. Bucky had given Steve the number almost four months ago now, but they had always chosen to Skype rather than limit themselves to just a voice call. Bucky loved seeing Steve’s face when they talked to each other.

Needless to say, once he’d done the quick mental calculation to work out the time difference, he was slightly concerned that something was wrong as he took the phone from Jones and retreated to the other side of the room away from the noise.

“Stevie?” he asked softly. “Is everything okay?”

“Heeeey...” Steve replied, his voice quiet. “Yeah, everything’s fine.”

“You sure? Isn’t it like, one in the morning for you?”

“Yeah...” murmured Steve. “I couldn’t sleep. I kinda missed your voice.”

Bucky smiled to himself as he sat down on his cot and turned on it so that he was facing away from everyone else.

“You did?”

“Mmhmm,” Steve confirmed. “Why d’ya have to be all the way over in Afghanistan?”

Bucky chuckled gently.

“Nature of the job, darlin’” he replied.

“Well, your job sucks,” said Steve with a gentle sigh. “It’s keepin’ you all the way over there, and I want you back here...”

Bucky stole a glance behind him to the rest of his squad – they were all busy with other things like writing letters, polishing boots, reorganising footlockers...the usual things for Saturday morning downtime. They were oblivious to his conversation. Swinging his legs up onto the bed, Bucky lay down and rolled onto his side, away from them.

“You’re tired,” he told Steve gently.

“I’m horny,” Steve countered immediately.

Bucky bit his lip. To be honest, so was he. He absolutely loved being in contact with Steve, spending a couple of hours a week talking to him and getting to know him, and the more Bucky had talked to him, the more he liked him. They flirted over Skype, very obviously, but ever since that first video call a few months ago, it had never gone any further. Truthfully, Bucky hadn’t known what to about it – Steve was gorgeous and sexy without really even knowing it, confident with himself, and funny and sweet. The pair of them got on like a house on fire, and Bucky had known for a fact that he really cared about Steve that day when that pretty angular face appeared all bruised and bloody on his laptop screen. If Bucky could have reached through to kiss it all better he would have. 

If he hadn’t have been posted on the other side of the world, he would have asked Steve out a long time ago. As it happened, Bucky wouldn’t dream of doing that to him when he was living in a literal war zone where the risk of being killed or injured was high. Steve deserved better than that, and so Bucky had been conscious to keep their relationship on simmer, no more than harmless flirting and talking about families and friends, likes and dislikes, hobbies and work. 

Right now though, simmer was being turned up to full heat and Bucky was finding it hard to resist.

“Stevie...”

“I’m horny, Buck,” Steve repeated lazily. “It’s one in the morning, I’m hard, I’m horny, and I wish you were ten minutes away so that I could get you here and in my bed.”

Bucky bit back a desperate whine.

“Oh God, Steve. You’re killin’ me here.”

On the other end of the phone, Steve gave the dirtiest chuckle Bucky had ever heard in his life.

“Am I really?” he replied, voice soft and innocent.

This time, Bucky groaned.

“You know you are! You can’t just call up a guy who’s been deployed for the last four months and tell him something like that. It’s cruel.”

“Do you wish you were in bed with me right now?” Steve asked.

“Steve...”

“Do you?”

Bucky looked over his shoulder just to check that nobody was listening in before whispering into the phone.

“Yes.”

Steve groaned softly in Bucky’s ear.

“What would you do?” he murmured.

“Steve,” Bucky replied desperately. “My whole squad is in the room. I can’t do this. I wanna do this, but I can’t – they’ll hear.”

“So?” Steve breathed. “Just listen to me.”

Bucky bit his lip again. This was such a bad idea – he just had to make one single sound and he’d give himself away to everybody. There would be no end to the merciless teasing he’d be subjected to, but Steve was on the other end of the phone and his breathing was getting heavier by the second. Bucky was hard as a fucking rock inside his pants.

“What are you doin’?” he asked.

“What do you think I’m doin’?” Steve replied. “I’ve got my phone on speaker and my hand around my fuckin’ dick, imagining it’s your mouth.”

“Holy Cow...”

Bucky turned and buried his face into his pillow. When he'd woken up that morning, Bucky had not at all expected to be talking to Steve at all, never mind listen to Steve getting himself off and running his mouth while he was doing it. Talk about unexpected. Not at all unwelcome, but very unexpected. And Bucky couldn't do a damn thing but lie there and listen.

“God, Bucky...you any idea how fuckin’ good your mouth feels?” Steve continued. “Mmmm...So hot and wet...and that thing you do where you suck on the head and run your tongue over it...fuck.”

Bucky’s mind went back to the night before he’d left for Afghanistan, of Steve lying naked on his back, legs wide and head thrown back as Bucky swallowed him down right there on the couch. He’d looked beautiful, his tiny, perfect ass fitting just right in Bucky’s hands, his cock just the perfect size for Bucky’s mouth.

“You know what I want, Buck?” Steve continued, his voice hitching slightly.

“What?” whispered Bucky.

“I want you to fuck me,” Steve breathed. “I know how you feel around my dick and it’s fucking amazing. Now I wanna know how great your cock feels in my ass.”

“Shit...”

“You like the sound’a that?”

“Yeah,” Bucky breathed.

He really did like it. The thought of burying himself inside Steve’s sweet, tight heat almost made him moan aloud and he had to stuff his fist in his mouth, biting down on his knuckles.

“I want you to open me up,” said Steve quietly, his breathing harsh. “Spread my ass open with your thumbs and use your tongue. Make me so nice and fuckin’ wet, baby...so when you put your fingers in me, they just slide right in...”

Bucky heard Steve suck in a breath and then let out a long groan on the other end of the phone. 

“Oh fuck, yeah...” Steve continued, his voice a little higher. “Oh God, I just put two fingers in and it feels so fuckin’ good, Buck. Wish this was you...wish it was your thick cock stretchin’ me out...”

“Fuck, Steve...”

“Oh...!” Steve moaned loudly. “Fucking shit Bucky, I’m not gonna last five fucking minutes like this...”

“’S okay, baby,” Bucky whispered, squeezing his eyes shut and pressing his knees together tightly. “You do what you want.’

“Yeah? You gonna let me ride your dick real fuckin’ hard? Get your cock in me so fuckin’ deep that I scream? Jerk me off real rough while I bounce on ya?”

“Anything you want, Steve,” Bucky replied, his voice muffled by the pillow.

“It’s so fuckin’ good, Buck. Feels so good, it’s gonna make me come. You wanna hear it? You wanna hear me bust and come all over myself because I’m thinkin’ about you fuckin’ me?”

Christ, but Bucky was about to burst himself. Inside the confines of his pants he was achingly hard, his dick leaking against the fabric of his underwear. A single touch would probably have had him coming hot inside of them but he couldn’t, because no matter how amazing Steve sounded on the other end of that phone, Bucky’s entire squad were sitting just meters away.

“Bucky...”

His name spilled from Steve’s lips in a choked cry, breath harsh and shuddering, and Bucky knew that Steve’s orgasm had hit. He listened to Steve gasp and moan his way through it, imagining those beautiful slender fingers of one hand inside him, while the other milked his cock dry. Bucky bit the pillow under his head and listened silently to Steve’s come down.

“You okay?” he asked a couple of minutes later.

“Yeah...”

Steve’s voice was a gentle murmur, slow and sleepy. Bucky let out a low chuckle as he ran a hand through his own hair.

“Sleepy now?”

“Mmhmm...”

He smiled to himself. He could just picture Steve in his bed, eyes closed, his blond hair a mess and damp with sweat, and his fair skin flushed pink as his little chest rose and fell quickly. Bucky only wished he was there to kiss him good night.

“Go to sleep, baby,” he murmured.

His response was Steve’s quiet breathing, already asleep.

Sighing heavily, Bucky ended the call and pressed the heels of his hands against his eyes. He was still so fucking hard, and needed to do something about it as soon as possible. Quickly, he sat up, tossed the phone back on the bed and grabbed his towel, heading for the shower.

“Hey Sarge? Steve okay?”called Dugan as Bucky passed with his towl strategically covering the large bulge in the front of his pants.

“Yeah. Yeah, he’s fine. He just couldn’t sleep.”

“Awww,” said Morita with a grin. “It’s so sweet that your boyfriend calls you when he can’t sleep all the way back in Brooklyn.”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Bucky replied.

“So...your hard-on has nothing to do with having been on the phone to Steve for the last fifteen minutes then?” Dugan said innocently.

Bucky had almost made it to the doorway, but he stopped dead and shut his eyes, letting out a hard sigh.

“I hate you all,” he muttered.

Bucky headed off in the direction of the showers with the laughter of his whole squad ringing in his ears. He didn’t care – it had been worth it.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again to all my proof-readers, cheerleader, and military advisors <3

Since meeting Steve, Natasha had also taken to spending the vast majority of her weekends on his couch, curled up with Sam, and watching sports on Steve’s TV. Steve never minded – he liked the company and they both brought food and drinks over with them, so it’s not like they were eating Steve out of house and home. Besides, it meant that he could draw or paint on the other side of the room while the two of them cheered on whatever team they were watching, being involved without really being involved. 

It kind of became a weekend tradition for them all, and Steve often wondered what it would be like once Bucky came back. Of course, he then had to remind himself that Bucky might not necessarily be stationed close to home – not only did the army have bases all over the country, but all over the world. Bucky could come back from his deployment only to be posted to a base in Europe or the Pacific, never mind the other side of the United States. Steve tried not to think about that part too hard, but he did like to imagine the four of them sitting on the couch together, cheering on the baseball or the football or whatever sport was on that day. It was a really nice daydream.

The notification alert sounded on his phone and Steve automatically deleted the message without looking at it and went back to cleaning his paintbrushes. He received another one a few moments later, and then another, until Sam finally turned around on the couch to look at him, an eyebrow raised.

“Do you want us to leave so you can do something about those?”

Steve looked up from his brushed, confused.

“What?” he said. “No, why?”

Sam glanced at Natasha, who kept her expression neutral.

“Well, it’s just that I’m so used to getting kicked out when your Grindr alert goes off but you’re just kind of...sitting there.”

Steve bit his lip guiltily. 

“Yeah,” he replied slowly. “Sorry. I just haven’t really got around to deleting it yet.”

“Deleting it?” Sam repeated, stealing another glance at Natasha who raised a perfectly shaped eyebrow in response.

“Yeah,” said Steve again as he turned the sound off on his phone and shoved it in his pocket with a sigh. “I’m just...I dunno. I’m not interested anymore.”

To be quite honest, Steve hadn’t used his Grindr app at all in the last three months. He was honestly no longer interested in any of the guys that messaged him, no matter what they looked like or what they were into, or even if Steve himself was horny as hell. 

He knew he could have sex at any time if he wanted. That was the thing with Grindr – there was always somebody in the vicinity who was up for something at any time of the day. Yet one night, a few weeks ago, Steve had used his international call card to phone Bucky in Afghanistan rather than get a real person to his apartment to fuck his brains out. The next morning, Steve had been a little ashamed of himself for doing it, and he hadn’t done it since because, as he kept telling himself, they weren’t boyfriends. So, Steve had kept the Grindr app on his phone, knowing fine well that he didn’t want to use it, but having no reason yet to get rid of it. 

“You’re not interested?” Sam echoed.

“Because of James?” Natasha asked, turning fully on the couch to rest her chin on the back cushion.

Steve felt his ears start to grow hot.

“No...” he replied uncertainly.

Sam and Natasha glanced at each other again.

"Let me ask you a question Steve,” Sam said slowly. “Have you been with anyone since Bucky?"

The heat in Steve’s ears started to spread to his face and he rubbed the back of his neck nervously. He had tried. It wasn’t as though Bucky Barnes had entered his life and proceeded to ruin Steve for every other man in the world...except that he sort of had. Steve had set up a couple of meets with guys but had bailed last. Sometimes they’d get through the door and clothes had started to come off before Steve had realised that it wasn’t what he’d wanted.

The biggest problem was that he’d experienced something with Bucky that he’d never had with any other person in his life – a taste of what it could be with somebody when it wasn’t just a hook-up, somebody who wasn’t just a throwaway fuck. As much as Steve wanted to tell himself that this wasn’t about Bucky, in a way it was all about him. Steve liked him a lot, he liked how they could talk about everything and nothing for ages, liked how Bucky got all of Steve’s jokes and understood why he was the way he was. None of those other guys could possibly compare.

“No,” he replied quietly, eyes on the floor to avoid seeing Sam and Natasha’s reactions.

“So, basically, you’re being monogamous to your not-boyfriend,” said Sam.

Steve sighed.

“It’s not like that.”

“So what _is_ it like?” asked Natasha. “You’re sitting there telling us that you’re no longer interested in hooking up, and that James was the last person you had sex with, four months ago.”

“It’s not a big deal,” Steve mumbled at his feet.

Sam made a noise of irritation.

“I beg to differ Steve I think it is kind of a big deal, for you at least. You’ve always insisted that nobody would ever date you so you never bothered looking for anything past what happened in the moment. Then suddenly you meet Bucky and your attitude changes entirely. You know that you like him, and we know that you like him.”

“Honestly, you’re all he talks about when he Skypes me,” Natasha chipped in. “The first thirty seconds he asks how I’m doing but then it’s all about you.”

“See? He likes you too,” Sam continued. “You two have something and you both know it. Why is it so hard for you to admit it?”

“Because it’s terrifying!” Steve replied, his voice loud with frustration. “I’ve never been here before and I don’t know what I’m supposed to do about it.” 

Natasha and Sam shared another look as Steve finally looked back up at them.

“I know that I’ve never been anyone’s idea of a catch. I’m short, I’m too skinny, I have a million health problems that cause me to be housebound a lot of the time, so I’ve gone my whole life with my defences up so I don’t get hurt. And then he comes along and I just know that it’s different, and I want it – I really do, but I can’t shake this nagging feeling that it’s not real. All this talking and joking and getting to know each other, and what if it turns out that I’m wrong, huh? What if he comes back and it turns out I was just something to fill in the time?”

He watched as Natasha’s brow furrowed.

“Steve,” she said quietly. “That’s not how it is. He’s not that kind of guy.”

Steve sighed and buried his face in his hands, digging the heels into his eyes.

“I know,” he mumbled. “I’ve just been in self-preservation mode so long that it’s hard to stop.”

“Okay,” Sam said seriously. “I’ll stop teasing, but I guarantee you that your concern on this matter is unfounded.”

Steve snorted and dropped his hands into his lap. He really did hope that Sam was right, because Steve Rogers was well on his way to being in far too deep when it came to Bucky Barnes and he didn’t know how to apply the brakes.

“If you say so,” he replied, standing up. “Now, I don’t know about you guys but I’m starving. Pizza?”

Natasha and Sam both agreed that pizza sounded like an excellent plan and Steve went to hunt down a menu. While the others were arguing over whether to order Hawaiian or Pepperoni, Steve casually deleted the Grindr app from his phone. 

~

There was a heat shimmer on the ground in the distance, blurring the colourless sky and the bumpy, rocky dirt into one. Bucky’s body rocked from side to side as the vehicle drove over the uneven ground, just one in a long convoy of beige desert camouflage. He watched the scenery go by as he began to feel slowly cooked in all of his kit in a vehicle that lacked air conditioning, sweat pooling in his hair under his helmet and trickling down the back of his neck. His gun lay across his lap, ready at a second’s notice. 

Bucky wasn’t at all surprised to feel the vehicle grind to a halt a short while later and he sighed as the Lieutenant approached his window.

“Suspected IED, Barnes. I need your squad on the perimeter.”

“Yes, sir,” he replied and immediately turned to the expectant faces of the Howling Commandos.

They were all straight-backed and alert, professional. The guys were a bunch of crazy idiots most of the time but Bucky knew that they were all damn well capable of doing their jobs and doing them well in the field. 

“Alright, you guys know the drill. Dugan and Jones to the right, Morita with me to the left – space out and cover with the rest.”

“Yes, Sergeant,” was the unanimous reply. 

They all jumped out, and Bucky was suddenly hyper alert. The lack of colour variation of the surroundings could be disorienting and he didn’t like it when the convoys stopped next to a rocky outcrop. The vehicles were all stopped, spaced out a hundred yards apart so they couldn’t be boxed in if the front and rear trucks were hit. 

He knew Dernier was already up front with the ground troops checking out the threat. Dernier was a genius when it came to explosives and had acquired the nickname of ‘The Bomb Whisperer’, quite often included in the convoy personnel. Bucky’s eyes swept back and forth over his arc, narrowed against the odd light. He knew that he didn’t have to check on the others – they’d be right where they needed to be, doing exactly what they’d been told to do, and all they had to do was wait for the IED to be cleared. Waiting was the worst part, out in the open, the entire convoy vulnerable to attack. 

They all remained at their positions, covering their arc, watching out for movement, all baking inside of their armour until the call came from the front that everything was all clear, filtered down through the Sergeants. Bucky raised his hand to signal his squad to get back to their vehicle, and that’s when all hell broke loose.

It had been expected, obviously. Bucky had honestly hoped that this time, they could just make it back to the convoy without being fired upon, but as the first crack of a shot rang out and echoed off the rocky outcrop, he somehow found the time to feel incredibly irritated.

“COVER!” he yelled to Morita as they all dropped behind the armoured vehicles and returned fire. 

Ahead, Bucky heard the engines of the front vehicles roar back to life and the sound filtered down as the convoy started up again. It wasn’t a large skirmish – the insurgents had obviously only been interested in trying to pick off whoever they could before retreating. His squad were returning sporadic fire, the last group left as everyone else climbed into their vehicles under the cover of top fire.

Bucky couldn’t see a soul up in the beige-grey rocks, despite the occasional stutter of fire still coming from them. He heard the zip of a close shot and felt himself stumble slightly, his hand touching the dust briefly before he pushed himself back up and fired back. 

The rocks were silent by the time the Howling Commandos climbed into the last free vehicle in the convoy, blood and adrenaline pumping fast around their bodies, dust covering their hands and faces. Bucky slammed his door shut and let out a long breath as he sat back, the suspension already bouncing under the uneven ground. 

“Good job guys,” he said, turning to his squad.

They were all eying him warily.

“Sarge...” Dugan murmured.

“What?”

Bucky frowned, suddenly concerned. His mind ran through all the things that could possibly make them all look at him in that way in the next two seconds – his squad were all accounted for, all dusty but unscathed. 

“You maybe wanna let us look at that?” Morita said slowly, indicating to Bucky’s left arm.

His stomach knotted tightly as his eyes slowly dropped and he finally saw why everyone was looking strangely at him. Bucky’s entire sleeve above his elbow was covered in fresh blood.

~

When Steve’s alarm first went off, the high-pitched beep piercing the veil of sleep and disrupting a perfectly pleasant dream, he groaned loudly, buried his face into his pillow, and swatted feebly at his alarm clock, wondering why it had been on in the first place. 

Then he remembered.

With a jolt, Steve pushed himself upright, blinked a couple of times to get rid of the sleep that had crusted in the corners of his eyes during the night, and turned the damn thing off properly. Today was Bucky day. 

Steve reached for his glasses and rolled out of bed, searching through the pile of clothes at his feet to find something that was mostly clean and not covered in paint or charcoal before padding through his apartment for coffee. Bucky Day always had Steve in a great mood – he’d even stopped putting in his contact lenses first thing because Bucky said his glasses were cute. There had once been a time where Steve Rogers would have just laughed and thought nothing of that comment ever again, but somehow, knowing that Bucky liked his glasses just made Steve want to wear them more often. He honestly had no idea what was happening to him.

Twenty minutes later, armed with a stack of toast and a mug of strong coffee, Steve sat on his couch and opened up his laptop, munching away as he waited patiently for the start-up sequence to finish so that he could load up Skype. He checked the time dutifully, and upon noticing that it was exactly on the hour, he clicked on Bucky’s username and felt his heart start to beat slightly faster in anticipation.

The face that appeared however, was not the familiar blue-eyed, dimple-chinned face of Bucky Barnes, but rather that of Private Gabriel Jones, looking sombre. Steve frowned in confusion.

“Hey Jones,” he greeted the soldier uncertainly. “Is Bucky there? We’re supposed to talk today.”

Jones rubbed the top of his shaved head.

“Steve...uh...no...Sarge isn’t here.”

Steve frowned.

“What? Did he forget?”

Bucky had never once forgotten or been late to a video chat in the last five months. It would have been terribly out of character for him to forget after all this time, but Steve’s brain didn’t want to even consider alternatives.

“No, he didn’t forget,” replied Jones. “He just...can’t come right now.”

Steve’s frown deepened, his heart now beating faster for entirely different reasons.

“Where is he? In a briefing?”

“No...”

“Gabe,” Steve said firmly, his voice low. “Tell me where he is.”

Private Jones cast a desperate glance over the top of the laptop and in the next second, Dugan appeared, looking the most serious that Steve had ever seen him.

“He’s in medical,” Dugan told him. “We were escorting a convoy back to Kandahar today, there was a skirmish...Sarge got hit.”

“Oh that’s just great, Dugan,” came Morita’s voice from the other side of the laptop. “We were supposed to NOT worry him.”

“Well, I aint gonna lie to him, Jim,” Dugan countered.

Steve barely heard them bickering. His blood had turned ice cold, the world slowed down around him and his chest felt tight, his face too hot.

“I need to see him,” Steve managed to say, his voice sounding thick to his own ears.

The Howling Commandos looked uncertain.

“Steve, I’m not sure...”

“I need to see him right now,” Steve interrupted Dugan. “You pick this laptop up, you carry it to wherever Medical is, _this very second_ , and let me see him.”

The soldiers glanced at each other, surprised at his commanding tone.

“Okay,” Dugan said eventually.

Steve’s coffee was going cold as he paced around the room, waiting for Dugan to walk the distance between the barracks and the medical bay. He was panicking and he knew it – there had been a skirmish, Bucky had been hit. So many horrible images flashed through Steve’s mind of Bucky injured – he’d heard horror stories of soldiers who had lost limbs, been hit in places that left them paralysed for life. What if that had happened to Bucky? What if he was lying in the medical bay, hooked up to a million machines and drips, parts of him missing?

The sound of voices directed Steve’s attention back to the laptop and he stubbed his toe on the coffee table as he ran back to the couch.

“BUCKY?” Steve practically yelled, ignoring the hot, throbbing pain in his foot as he knelt in front of his laptop, the medical bay of Kandahar Air Base coming into view as Dugan entered.

“Steve?”

His heart leapt at the sound of Bucky’s confused voice, and Steve could have wept with joy as Dugan turned the laptop and handed it to the bewildered Sergeant, who looked dusty and tired but otherwise in perfect health.

“Thank fuck, I thought you were dead...” Steve whispered, running his hands over his face in relief.

“What?” Bucky replied in surprise. “No! No, Steve...I’m fine.”

“Dugan said you got hit,” Steve said weakly as he hoisted himself back up onto the couch, watching as Bucky shot Dugan a disbelieving look over the laptop.

“I asked them to tell you I’d call you back in like, a half hour,” he said. “We just got back and I’m still getting cleaned up.”

Bucky shifted the laptop from were Dugan had placed it on a nearby table and turned it so that Steve could see the medic leaning over his left arm with a swab.

“Sorry Steve,” Dugan said from off screen. “I didn’t mean to scare ya.”

“Well y’did,” Steve replied, feeling too drained to sound annoyed.

He drew his knees up to his chest and hugged one of the smaller couch cushions to his chest as he watched the medic continue to clean the wound up.

“So what happened?”

Bucky looked at him and sighed.

“Uh...a stray bullet hit my arm.”

“You were in a fire fight?”

“It’s kinda my job, Steve,” Bucky said gently.

“I know, it’s just...every time I see you, you’re sitting in the barracks or giving me tours around the base. I just, kinda forgot that you were in an active war zone.”

Bucky gave him a small smile as Steve rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. 

“They weren’t meant to tell you. I was gonna get patched up and call you right back when I was done.”

“Is it bad?” Steve asked.

Bucky laughed.

“Nah. It’s like, a scratch.”

“Bucky...” Steve replied seriously.

“It is!” Bucky insisted. “It barely grazed me. It’s like, a couple of stitches, some painkillers and some antibiotics, bandage me up and I’m back to normal service in the morning. Honestly sweetie, I’m fine. It's not like I'm gonna lose my arm or somethin'.”

Steve let out a long breath, running his hand through his hair.

“I know you are,” he said. “I just...I got scared for a few seconds. I kinda really care about you too, y’know?”

He watched Bucky’s cheeks turn pink under the beige dust that covered his skin. The smile the sergeant gave him made Steve’s heart glow.

“Well, now you know how I felt when you went and got yourself all beaten up,” Bucky replied.

“Yeah, I guess so,” murmured Steve.

“I’m sorry those idiots scared you.”

“It’s okay,” Steve replied, giving Bucky a lopsided grin. “I mean, my coffee went cold and my toast is soggy now, but I’ll live.”

Bucky chuckled.

“Why don’t you go get some fresh, and I’ll talk to you later, huh? You don’t wanna stick around while I get sewn up – it’s kinda gross.”

A real laugh bubbled up out of Steve’s chest.

“Yeah okay,” he replied. “Just...promise me you’ll make it through the next four weeks, okay? I’d like you back home in one piece.”

Bucky smiled at him, eyes crinkling at the corners.

“I’ll do my best, Stevie.”

“You’d better, you jerk.”

Steve was smiling as the call ended, the knots in his stomach finally unravelled enough so that he felt hungry again. Bucky was okay – his wound was minor and he’d been smiling and cracking jokes. Steve sighed softly as he picked up his plate of soggy toast and mug of cold coffee and carried them through to the kitchen, disposing of them so he could make fresh.

He knew he was in way too deep with Bucky now. Steve had no idea what he would ever have done if he’d lost him.

~

Bucky sighed heavily as he ended the video call with Steve, wincing slightly as the medic injected some local anaesthetic into his arm around the bullet wound.  
He was going to have to seriously chew out his squad for terrifying the crap out of Steve like that. Bucky hadn’t been planning on telling Steve at all that he’d been shot. He would have put on a clean shirt to hide his bandage and gone on with the video call as normal and nobody would have been any wiser. But now Steve knew, and he’d tell Natasha which meant that he’d get his ear chewed off by her, and if Natasha knew it was only a matter of time before his family found out.

It wasn’t the first wound he’d ever had, but this was the first anyone would know about. He’d been pretty good so far with keeping knowledge of his injuries within his squad.  
Bucky caught movement at the corner of his eye and he glanced up to find that Dugan was still there, leaning in the doorway and wearing a faint smile.

“What?” asked Bucky.

Dugan’s smile widened.

“Y’know Sarge, for all you keep insisting that Steve isn’t your boyfriend, he sure as hell seems like he’s your boyfriend.”

Bucky sighed again and rubbed his temple with his free hand, not wanting to dignify the comment with a response. After a moment, Dugan spoke again.

"Jimmy," he said, quieter this time, more serious, "It’s pretty damn obvious that you two really care about each other. Why are you dancing around this?"

Bucky looked at his friend and bit his lip. It wasn’t as though he hadn’t that about this issue on a frequent basis – he wanted to talk to Steve about it, to find out if that gorgeous little blond felt the same about Bucky as Bucky felt about him, but after the day he’d just had, it was glaringly obvious why he never had.

“Because I have to,” he replied sadly. “Look at me - I could have been killed today. A few more inches difference in trajectory and that bullet could have hit my neck, or my thigh, and I would have bled out before you could all have got me back here. What would that have done to Steve, huh? You saw how he was when you told him I’d been hit. It’s bad enough having to sit there and hear somebody you care about has been hurt, or worse, killed, but when you officially give that person the title of boyfriend? That would shatter him. I can’t do that to him, Dum Dum - I care too much about him to break his heart.”

From the doorway, Dugan inhaled deeply and slowly nodded.

“I guess I can understand that,” he replied.

“I know you can,” murmured Bucky. “I like him, Tim. Okay? I like him a huge fucking deal, but I can’t ask him to be with me like that when I’m over here doing a job that can get me killed. It’s not fair to him.”

“You’re right,” Dugan said. “He’s a great kid. Just promise me one thing?”

“What?”

“The second you get home, you take that great kid out on a date.”

Bucky gave the Corporal a lopsided grin.

“I promise I’ll ask him. I can’t promise he’ll say yes.”

“Trust me,” Dugan told him with one hundred percent confidence. “He’ll say yes.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fuck, this chapter was so horrifically problematic! So glad it's done, and thank you to everyone who read through it for me, and came back with advice and encouragement xxx

“STEEEEEEEEEEEVE!” chorused Bucky’s whole squad, their voices loud as Skype connected and the video feed showed them all crowded around the laptop with Bucky sitting in the middle.

“Holy crap,” Steve replied in surprise. “What the fuck, fellas? You scared the Hell outta me!”

It was two weeks until the end of Bucky’s deployment in Afghanistan and Steve had started to get antsy. He was excited and nervous all at the same time, dying to see Bucky again but also a little afraid of it because the nature of their relationship had changed so drastically. When they had first met, Bucky had just been a hot guy with a gorgeous body and a tight ass that Steve had wanted to get into. By the end of that first time, Steve hadn’t been able to stop thinking about him, and after six months of phone calls and Skype, of talking and flirting and thinking he’d almost lost Bucky to a bullet, Steve couldn’t deny that his feelings for the Sergeant had seriously increased.

All he wanted now was to see Bucky, to wrap his arms around his neck and kiss him for all he was worth but still he had that nagging feeling that Bucky might not feel the same. It was driving Steve crazy, making him nervous, and the raucous greeting from the Howling Commandos hadn’t helped matters much.

“Sorry, Steve!” Gabe Jones said, beaming at him from behind Bucky’s right shoulder.

“Yeah, we just got some great news!”

“They’re just a tad excited, Steve,” added Falsworth from the edge of the group, shaking his head with a fond smile.

Steve looked directly at Bucky who was grinning as wide as the rest of them.

“Why? What’s happened?”

From the middle of the group, Bucky chuckled at him and straightened up in his chair.

“Uh...we got our orders,” he replied. “Two weeks time and we’ll be at our new base.”

Steve’s stomach immediately knotted. He’d always known this day would come, the day that Bucky found out where he’d be after he came back from Afghanistan, and he’d known that there was absolutely no guarantee where he’d end up. Bucky could come back from deployment only to be sent to a base in the damn Pacific and then they’d have to start this whole thing all over again. Plastering a smile on his face, he asked the question.

“Where?”

Dugan beamed at him as he gave Bucky’s left shoulder a squeeze.

“It’s kind of a small base, Steve. You might not have heard of it.”

“Yeah,” chipped in Morita with a smirk. “But it’s at least easy enough to get to.”

“You guys are killin’ me here,” Steve muttered. “Can you just tell me which base you’re being stationed at?”

They all quietened down and every pair of eyes turned to their Sergeant who took a deep breath as he rubbed the back of his neck nervously and glanced away.

“Fort Hamilton,” Bucky said quietly.

Steve’s world stopped for a second as he attempted to process what Bucky had just told him.

“Fort Hamilton?” he repeated, his own voice sounding dull and far away.

“Yes.”

“The one in New York?”

“Yes.”

“Brooklyn?”

“Yes.”

“Fifteen minutes from my apartment?”

“Yes,” Bucky said again, his face split into a huge grin.

The noise that escaped Steve’s mouth was a particularly unattractive honk, halfway between a sob and a laugh, as his stomach unknotted all at once and a rush of joy flooded through him. He clamped a hand over his mouth as the Howlers laughed kindly at his fluster, patting Bucky on the back as they began to move away and leave them to talk.

Bucky gnawed at his lip, a small smile playing about his face.

“I take it you think its good news?” he asked Steve quietly.

Steve swallowed the fountain of emotion bubbling up inside of him and took a deep breath, sitting on his hands to stop them shaking. Bucky was coming home, not just for a few weeks but for the foreseeable future and suddenly, all of Steve’s daydreams from the last six months seemed possible. He nodded slowly.

“Yeah. Yeah, it’s great news,” he replied, trying to act as cool as possible under the circumstances. “You’ll be close to Natasha and your family...and you get the extra added bonus of having me live a few blocks away.”

Bucky’s smile widened.

“Yeah, I was kinda pleased about that.”

“You were?” asked Steve.

“Of course,” Bucky replied quietly. “It would make it easier to see each other...if you wanted to, that is...”

Steve felt the tips of his ears heat up and he felt himself smile.

“You wanna see me again?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Bucky murmured. “I mean, I was gonna wait until I got back and all to say this, but uh...I’ve been thinking about it for a while, y’know and uh...I guess now is as good a time to just...”

Bucky trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck again as he looked at the ground to the right. Steve raised an eyebrow.

“What?”

He watched Bucky take a deep breath and look up again.

“Can I take you out to dinner when I get back?” Bucky asked him. 

Steve huffed out a laugh and grinned.

“Well,” he said cheerfully, “as long as y’know that it’ll be my first date since middle school...then yeah, I’d love that.”

Bucky’s answer was drowned out by the roar of appreciation that went up from the Howling Commandos in the background. Dugan let out an ear-splitting ‘WAHOOO!’ that was only marginally louder than Morita’s ‘Finally! It only took y’all six damn months!’ and Jones and Dernier’s singing in French with Falsworth’s slow applause only just audible.  
Steve burst out laughing as Bucky rolled his eyes and smiled. 

“I guess they approve,” he said dryly.

“I guess so,” Steve replied. 

They grinned at each other for a second, Steve feeling giddy at the thought of actually going out on a date in public with Bucky Barnes in two weeks’ time. It was actually going to happen and he could hardly wait.

“I’ll let you know what day and time I’ll be getting back,” said Bucky. “I’ll book a place...what food do you like.”

“Everything,” replied Steve, unable to stop smiling.

“Well, that makes it easy,” Bucky chuckled. 

Steve laughed and took a deep breath.

“I can’t wait,” he said quietly.

“Me neither,” Bucky replied as the Howling Commandos began to quiet down and crowd the laptop again.

Dugan grinned at Steve and clapped Bucky heartily on the back.

“See, Sarge? I toldja he’d say yes!”

Bucky’s cheeks flushed as he glowered at his Corporal and shook his head in dismay.

“You guys suck, you know that?” he muttered.

Nothing could wipe the smile from Steve’s face as the guys said goodbye, blowing him kisses and waving before the screen went black a few minutes later and Steve collapsed backwards into the couch cushions, feeling like he was floating on air. 

Only two weeks to go and he’d see Bucky again, in the flesh. He didn’t know how he’d possibly last that long.

~

Two weeks felt like forever to Bucky, the days ticking by so slowly, punctuated only by one more video call with Steve in which neither of them could stop grinning like maniacs. Bucky couldn’t wait to get back to Brooklyn to take him out on a date.

He’d called up Natasha to tell her as soon as he could – his best friend had been thrilled.

“Oh my God. Finally!” Natasha had said.

“What do you mean ‘finally’?” asked Bucky indignantly.

“Oh c’mon James,” she’d replied. “Ever since that first hookup, you two have been pining for each other. I’m just happy you actually pulled your head out of your ass and did something about it.”

Bucky had asked Natasha to make reservations at a little French place that he liked where the food was good but not all that expensive, the lighting was romantic, and the glasses were always full of wine. It was booked for the first night Bucky was back, which meant that he really needed to get a few decent hours of sleep beforehand.

It was never a direct flight to or from Afghanistan, which is what made it all the more exhausting. First, Bucky had to get a flight from Kandahar to one of the US bases in Germany, and from there, another flight to a base on the East Coast, and then a flight to New York, finally ending in a very expensive cab ride from JFK to Brooklyn so that he could collapse on Natasha’s doorstep.

“Holy shit, I thought I’d never get here,” Bucky huffed as he dumped his two heavy bags onto the floor of Nat’s apartment and enveloped her in a long, firm hug.

“Poor babe,” she replied sympathetically, standing on tiptoe to kiss his cheek as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

“I don’t know why the military have to deprive you of sleep for so fucking long. Why they can’t just do direct flights from there to here, I have no clue.”

He felt Natasha’s grin against his cheek and he sighed softly as he breathed her in. Nat always smelled amazing, her hair soft and citrus-scented and Bucky could never resist holding her for as long as he could – Natasha smelled like home.

“C’mon, soldier,” she said eventually. “Let’s get some proper food down you before you shower.”

Bucky groaned in dismay.

“Can’t I sleep first?”

“No,” Nat countered. “You’ve been travelling for twenty four hours at least and you’ve been awake for much longer than that, and you stink. I love you, but the stench of unwashed man is permeating the walls of my apartment and killing my senses, so shower first.”

He rolled his eyes at her but smiled as she herded him into the kitchen.

“Fine,” Bucky replied, hoisting himself up onto the stool at her counter as Natasha set to work fixing him something to eat.

He almost fell asleep standing upright in the shower, the hot water washing away the ache in his muscles and relaxing him completely, sweat and grime carried away by the rivulets that rolled down his skin. After patting himself dry with a soft fluffy white towel that smelled of Jasmine fabric softener, Bucky forced himself into clean underwear and t-shirt, and climbed into the bed in Natasha’s spare room. 

Bucky groaned softly in bliss as he settled back against the squashy pillow under his head and snuggled under the warm blanket. This was probably his favourite part about coming home – the chance to sleep in a real bed, to have his body supported by a proper mattress and have real pillows and thick covers to cocoon in. A tour in Iraq and this past one in Afghanistan had made him appreciate beds in a whole different light.

“Comfortable?” Natasha asked from the doorway.

“Mmhmm...” Bucky mumbled, not evening opening his eyes as he pulled the blankets up to his chin and sighed happily.

She laughed softly as she closed the door and padded over the carpeted floor, lifting the edge of the covers and sliding in next to him. Bucky immediately reached out to cuddle her in, pulling Natasha close enough so that their noses touched.

He’d lost count of the amount of times they’d done this since they’d first met, back when they were fifteen and going through a wealth of family shit that made life seem so hopeless. They’d been each other’s comfort back then and it hadn’t changed after ten years. Bucky sighed as Natasha ran a finger gently over the still-pink scar of the bullet wound he’d received a month ago.

“You’re an idiot,” she whispered.

“I know,” Bucky replied, smiling.

“Steve was really worried.”

“I know that too,” he said. “Although that totally was not my fault. I told the guys to say I’d call him back when I’d been patched up, and instead they told him I’d been shot.”

Nat snorted quietly.

“I hope you yelled at them.”

“Damn right I did! Assholes, scarin’ my Stevie like that.”

Natasha went still beside him and finally Bucky cracked open an eye.

“What?” he asked when he saw her grinning at him.

“Your Stevie?”

Bucky groaned and buried his face into the pillow. It had been out of his mouth before he’d even thought about it, and if he hadn’t have been so exhausted, he might have been able to filter. It was no good hiding anything from Natasha though, not after all these years and all the things they’d gone through together.

“Yeah well,” he said eventually. “I’m kinda hopin’ he is.”

Natasha chuckled as she tenderly pushed Bucky’s hair back from his face.

“Well, I’m pretty sure you’ll know after tonight,” she murmured.

Bucky’s belly squirmed delightfully. He was so very excited to see Steve again. Just the thought of that tiny artist with his floppy blond hair and those amazing hands of his, and his beautiful big blue eyes was enough to get Bucky breathing heavily. Just a few more hours and he’d be sitting opposite Steve in a gorgeous restaurant, eating delicious food, drinking fine wine, and hopefully stroking the inside of Steve’s perfect wrist whilst staring into his eyes by candlelight.

Nat moved forward and kissed him on the nose.

“Get some sleep, James. You need to be refreshed and ready for your date.”

He grinned at her as she climbed back out of the bed and tucked the blankets back around him.

“Thanks Nat.”

She returned his smile and walked to the door, turning back to him as she opened it.

“Although, I’d bet you ten bucks that you two won’t even make it to the restaurant,” she said.

Bucky laughed.

“We’ll see,” he replied.

~

Steve stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror and exhaled slowly. As usual, this was about as good as he was ever going to look, which wasn’t really saying much. His skin was clean and free of paint, hair washed, combed, and styled away from his face, but nothing could hide the fact that his features were too angular and that his collarbones were visible and sharp under the open neck of his button-down shirt. 

It wasn’t like Steve didn’t eat, it’s just that he was constantly getting ill and his body burned so many calories trying to fix him. Steve really wished he could put on weight. He didn’t really even need all that much, just enough so that he didn’t look like a walking skeleton with all his bones visible through his skin. Steve didn’t even care about looking toned, as long as there was some padding on him.

Not that the thought was going to help him right at that moment anyway. Bucky was about to turn up at any minute and Steve still looked like himself. At least Bucky liked it, or at least Steve thought so. It’s not like he’d ever heard the soldier complain about visible ribs or bony hips when Steve’s cock had been buried deep in his ass. In fact, the way Steve remembered it, Bucky’s hands had been all over him on their last encounter six months ago, constantly trying to pull Steve closer, large hands gently kneading his ass, fingers trailing down the prominent bumps of Steve’s spine.

Thinking about it made Steve’s knees feel weak and he had to grab the sink for support. He was about to go on the first grown-up date of his entire life and he was getting himself all worked up over a memory before he had a foot out of the door. It wasn’t doing him any good at all to think of Bucky out of his clothes when they were about to be all civilised in public.

Turning on the cold water, Steve splashed his face a few times to calm himself down before drying off and straightening up just as he heard the knock on his front door. Immediately, his heart began to race and his breathing sped up. Steve shook his head and took a few deep breaths, forcing them to slow down before he had an asthma attack. It was ridiculous how pathetic he was.

Running a hand over his hair, Steve made it to the door, heart pounding, and pulled it open. 

Bucky stood there, smart in jeans and dark pea coat, and gorgeous as hell.

“Hey,” the soldier said, his face spread into a huge grin that Steve couldn’t help but return.

“Hey...” he breathed in response.

God, but Bucky Barnes was even more beautiful in the flesh than Steve remembered. That dimple in his chin was so deliciously biteable that it made Steve’s mouth water just to look at it, his broad shoulders beautifully framed in that perfectly cut coat, his smile just the right side of shy. Bucky was gorgeous. Completely gorgeous.

They stood there on either side of the doorway, silly grins plastered across their faces for a good ten seconds before Bucky chuckled and rubbed one hand nervously across the back of his neck.

“So...are you gonna invite me in?” he asked.

Steve inwardly cursed himself.

“Oh...sure, yes.”

He stood to the side to let Bucky in and blinked in surprise as the sergeant leaned down to kiss Steve’s cheek as he passed. It was light, lips barely brushing his skin, but Steve’s knees faltered once again at the gesture. He took a deep breath and smiled, closing the door.

“I just need to find my shoes,” Steve added as he led Bucky into the living room. “I’m not entirely sure where I left ‘em though.”

Bucky laughed.

“Mine usually end up under the couch. You should check there.”

“Good idea,” Steve replied, immediately dropping to his knees and crawling across the floor to his couch.

A few seconds of searching unearthed one of his shoes from underneath it, and the other one he found near the leg of the coffee table. With a triumphant noise, he glanced over his shoulder and waved his shoe at Bucky, whose eyes were most definitely fixed on Steve’s posterior. 

“You checkin’ out my ass, Sergeant?” he enquired, one eyebrow arched as he straightened up.

Bucky’s head lifted slightly, his delightfully dimpled chin jutting out in that charmingly cocky way Steve adored. 

“I might'a been...” 

Steve pushed himself to his feet and wandered over to him, shoes in hand. He plucked playfully at the hem of Bucky's coat as he drew close, looking up at the five-foot-eleven soldier through his eyelashes. 

“Did you like what you saw?” Steve asked, his voice low.

Flirting was familiar territory now with Bucky. They had done this over Skype so many times – the playful banter, the lip biting, the thing where one would glance away and then look back through lowered eyelashes. He knew for a fact that Bucky did indeed like when he’d seen, because those blue-grey had turned dark, black pupils almost completely consuming the colour of his irises, lower lip snagged on his teeth. 

Suddenly there was a hand on each side of Steve’s face as Bucky surged forward, kissing Steve hard and pushing him backwards. Steve’s back made contact with the solid surface of the wall and he groaned, lips parting to allow Bucky’s tongue to dip inside. Steve's hands went immediately to Bucky's coat buttons, fingers fumbling to get them loose so that he could tug the garment roughly from Bucky’s body.

"Screw dinner..." Steve muttered against Bucky's lips.

"Damn right," Bucky's huffed in reply. 

Steve hated the fact that Bucky’s hands had to relinquish their hold on him while he lost his coat. It had been six months, six agonisingly eternal months since he'd been touched in that way by anybody and now he had Bucky here, kissing him and pinning him to a wall and Steve wanted everything all at once. Finally rid of Bucky’s coat, Steve immediately began fighting with the belt buckle around Bucky’s hips, the metallic clink a harsh punctuation between their gasps as soft noises as they kissed.

Steve’s teeth san into Bucky’s lower lip and the soldier gasped sharply before pulling back, panting hard with one hand braced against the wall and the other covering Steve's, holding them still where they were still grappling with the belt.

"Hold on a second..." Bucky huffed gently.

Steve stopped, suddenly terrified for a single second that Bucky had changed his mind about everything. He’d worried about it, that somebody like Bucky couldn’t honestly want to be with a fella like Steve, that it had seemed like a good idea during his deployment but now, faced with somebody as small and painfully skinny as Steve was, Bucky might have realised that he’d made a mistake...

"What?" he breathed. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No..." Bucky whispered, smiling as he pushed himself away from the wall again. Slowly, he stroked his hands through the blond hair that Steve had carefully styled ten minutes before. "It's just that I've been waiting six whole months just to touch you again and now I'm here, I want it to last so much longer than the thirty seconds it would take if we keep up this pace."

Steve couldn’t help but laugh with relief as Bucky kissed the tip of his nose softly. Bucky wanted him – he really did. Natasha and Sam had been right all along. 

“Okay,” he agreed, nodding gently.

Steve fingers curled into the soft cotton of Bucky’s shirt as those hands cupped his face again and Bucky leaned down, placing soft kisses on Steve’s closed eyelids and pressing his lips to the faint freckles that covered his cheeks. Steve sighed happily as Bucky's mouth finally met his again, his body sinking forward into his warm, solid mass. 

They kissed slowly, tongues occasionally brushing as they fumbled with the buttons on each other’s shirts, pushing the clothing back from shoulders and exposing bare skin. Steve led Bucky towards the bedroom, walking carefully backwards towards the bedroom as they left a trail of clothes in their wake. In the doorway, after kicking off their pants, Bucky pulled Steve towards him and Steve shivered in delight as Bucky’s hands ran through his hair, over his shoulders, down his bare sides and over his ass to the backs of his thighs. He gasped sharply as Bucky lifted him as though he weighed no more than a feather, wrapping Steve’s skinny legs around his waist and they both laughed, the sound muffled by kisses as Bucky carried him to the bed and lay Steve gently down on his back.

Bucky hovered over him, beautiful in the soft lamp light, biting at his lower lip as his grey-blue eyes studied Steve’s face careful.

“God, you’re gorgeous,” Bucky murmured.

Steve felt the heat rise to his cheeks and he smiled.

“Shut up and kiss me,” he whispered in reply.

Bucky chuckled as Steve’s arms wrapped around his neck and pulled him back down. His mouth felt amazing, warm and soft of Steve’s skin as it left a trail of kisses down his neck and worked slowly across his chest. Steve’s fingers gripped the bedcovers firmly, his eyes fluttering closed with a low moan as Bucky worked down and across his concave stomach, gently tugging at the waistband of Steve’s underwear as he slid off the bed and onto the floor between Steve’s legs.

Steve couldn’t stop the noises that spilled from his mouth as Bucky’s lips grazed the inside of his thighs and the sensitive skin behind his knees, making him laugh and gasp at the same time. He’d had plenty of sex over the years – hard and hurried, slow and fun, sex that left marks on his skin and sex where they both had been unable to stop laughing, but this was new. 

Nobody in his entire life had taken the time to learn his body the way Bucky was doing, taking his time over every inch of skin and studying Steve’s reactions, the way he sucked in a breath and his muscle quivered when Bucky’s mouth pressed against one part of him, or the way Steve’s back arched and he let out a soft cry and buried his fingers into Bucky’s dark hair when his lips brushed somewhere else. 

Bucky didn't rush to open Steve up either, fingers slick with lube gently probing and stretching as he mouthed at Steve's hard shaft, nibbled at his prominent hipbones and moaned softly at Steve tugging sharply at his dark hair, now a panting, writhing, desperate mess on the bed.

“Oh my fucking God,” he gasped, hands pulling at Bucky’s hair as the soldier licked and nipped at Steve’s sharp collar bones.

Bucky hummed softly against his skin, fingers tracing the outline of Steve’s ribs as his chest rose and fell quickly. Every inch of his skin tingled where Bucky had touched him and Steve’s dick was so hard it ached. He felt like he would die if he didn’t have more, and right that minute. Steve dug his fingers into the firm muscle of Bucky’s bicep and tugged him upwards.

“C’mon...” he panted. “I need you to fuck me baby. I need it right now. C’mon...”

Bucky smothered his moaned response into Steve’s skinny shoulder as he settled over the top of the smaller body, pushing Steve’s legs wide apart to accommodate him.   
“You sure?” Bucky whispered, raising his head.

His hair was a mess from Steve’s fingers pulling at it and his lips were all kiss-swollen and wet. Steve watched him swallow visibly.

“Yes,” Steve murmured in reply, reaching up to gently caress Bucky’s cheek.

He reached for a condom as Bucky pushed himself up onto his elbows, watching as Steve tore open the packaging and grasped Bucky’s gorgeously thick cock with one hand and expertly rolled the latex sheath over the tip and down the shaft. Bucky’s teeth dug hard into his bottom lip the whole time as Steve reached for the bottle and poured out a very liberal amount, spreading it with a firm grip on Bucky’s dick from tip to base and back up again.

“C’mon,” he whispered again as he lay back down, slicked fingers dipping down between his ass cheeks for a second.

He pulled Bucky back down, nipping softly at his lip before kissing him properly. God, but Steve loved kissing that man, loved the way Bucky’s tongue grazed his with the lightest pressure, loved how his lower lip lingered for just a split second longer than the top. Steve moaned into Bucky’s mouth as the soldier settled back over him in the space between Steve’s thighs.

He sucked in a breath as the tip of Bucky’s cock breached him, his body easily stretching to accommodate as Steve wrapped his ankles around the top of Bucky’s thighs and held on, breathing through the initial discomfort and finding distraction in Bucky’s kisses. He moaned loudly as Bucky finally bottomed out, seated deep inside of him.

“Are you okay?” Bucky asked breathlessly against Steve’s lips, darkened grey-blue eyes searching his.

Steve could have laughed. Six months with his own fantasies couldn’t compare in the slightest to the way he was feeling at that moment with Bucky’s weight over him, Bucky inside of him, his hot mouth grazing Steve’s skin, those muscles taut under Steve’s hands.

“Perfect,” he breathed.

Bucky smiled and nuzzled Steve’s cheek gently before burying his face in the crook of Steve’s bony shoulder. He moved slow, rocking on his knees and staying deep, Steve’s neck pillowed in the bend of Bucky’s right elbow. Steve whimpered as Bucky sucked lightly on his neck just below his ear, back arching away from the bed and making them both moan loudly as Bucky’s cock went even deeper.

“Oh fuck, that feels so good...” Steve whispered, fingernails scraping across the back of Bucky’s neck at the hairline.

“Yeah,” agreed Bucky, his voice muffled by Steve’s hair.

“I been fuckin’ dreamin’ about this for months,” Steve confessed.

Bucky groaned and rolled his hips a little harder.

“Since that phone call?”

“Long before that phone call,” he admitted with a soft laugh that tailed off into a long moan as Bucky pulled back a little further and slid easily back in right to the base.

“That thing drove me nearly outta my mind,” Bucky whispered. “Lyin’ there with you a million miles away, wanting me to fuck you...listening to you come.”

Steve’s eyes flew open and he uttered a small cry as Bucky pushed back into him with a little more force, making Steve’s body move up the bed an inch.

“Oh fuck!” he gasped. “Is it as good as you thought it would be?”

“Better...” Bucky murmured into his neck. “You’re so tight...you feel fucking amazing...”

Steve whimpered again and dug his nails into the thick muscle of Bucky’s shoulders, delighting in the sharp gasp it caused. 

“You feel _incredible_ ,” replied Steve. “Fuck me harder baby...I need you to fuck me harder.”

Bucky picked up immediately, drawing right back and slamming harder into Steve on every thrust, slow and deep, leaving Steve so breathless he couldn’t even moan. He couldn’t get Bucky close enough, deep enough, pulling him in with his ankles around the backs of Bucky’s thighs, clawing at his shoulders, pulling at his hair. Steve couldn’t think straight, his body hot and tingling all over and everything was Bucky, inside of him, over him and still he couldn’t get enough.

“Oh God, that’s it...that’s the spot, right there...”

Bucky groaned against Steve’s ear, pressing a kiss to the soft, fleshy lobe.

“You feel amazing,” he whispered breathlessly. “So fucking good Steve...”

“You’re gonna make me come like this,” Steve gasped, feeling his toes go numb as the heat in the pit of his belly started to spread to his thighs and the small of his back.

“Fuck yeah baby. You wanna come with me inside you?”

Steve could only nod as Bucky sat back and slid one arm under the base of Steve’s spine, tilting his hips up and driving into him at a deeper angle, pushing him closer to the edge of orgasm. Bucky’s thumb brushed over the head of Steve’s hard, aching cock as he wrapped his free hand around it, the gentle pressure mixing with the hard slam of Bucky’s hips against his ass finally tipping him over with a hoarse cry, fingers digging hard into Bucky’s thighs as he came in hot white streaks over his own stomach.

Bucky fucked him through it, hard and slow, milking him of every drop until Steve’s entire body trembled. Bucky leaned down to kiss him, driving into Steve once more before his own orgasm hit, long and shuddering and breathless.

Steve’s blood pounded in his ears as he pressed minute kisses to Bucky’s lips, his chin, his cheeks, hands stroking over the firm muscles of Bucky’s back and Bucky’s fingers stroked through Steve’s hair. Finally, Bucky’s eyes opened and they looked at each other, noses touching, and Steve smiled.

“Welcome home, Buck,” he whispered.

~

They seemed to kiss for ages, slow and steady and sweet, fingers tracing patterns on each other’s skin. Steve’s skin was just as smooth and soft as Bucky had remembered it, that small, slight body fitting just perfectly into his arms like they’d been made to fit together. He’d never been so happy, so content in his whole life as he was lying there with Steve Rogers.

He had no idea how sex with Steve was so amazing, more than anyone else Bucky had ever been with. Six months of wanting to be back with him, curled up around him in a cosy bed in Brooklyn, and Bucky was finally here, kissing Steve leisurely like there was nothing else in the word they needed to do. They would have stayed there all night if Steve’s stomach hadn’t have growled loudly and caused them to break apart, laughing.

“Maybe we shouldn’t have skipped dinner,” Bucky murmured with a grin.

“It was totally worth it,” Steve replied, stretching luxuriously against Bucky’s side. 

Bucky chuckled and kissed him again, softly on the tip of his nose. Steve chuckled.

“We could order pizza?” Steve suggested.

“Sounds good.”

“Yeah? What do you like?”

“You...” Bucky replied, nuzzling Steve’s cheek gently and making him laugh.

“I meant pizza.”

Bucky grinned at him.

“I like anything,” he replied.

Steve chuckled.

“I’ll go get a menu,” he said, disentangling himself from Bucky’s arms and sliding naked from the bed.

Bucky bit his lip as he watched Steve’s perfect ass leave the room. He couldn’t believe he’d got so lucky with that guy, that somebody as good as Steve Rogers had agreed to date a person like him. He couldn’t believe Natasha had been right and that they hadn’t made it to dinner at all. 

“Y’know, I had this whole fancy dinner planned,” he told Steve as the blond re-entered the room with a pizza menu in hand, hair sticking up at all angles and looking adorable as all Hell. “It was this French restaurant – gorgeous food, good wine, candlelight. It would have been so romantic.”

Steve grinned at him as he climbed back under the covers and kissed Bucky’s nose gently.

“This _was_ romantic.”

“Yeah?” Bucky asked. 

“Yeah,” replied Steve. “You can take me out to dinner another time. I’m just happy that you’re finally here after six months on a totally different continent. It doesn’t matter what we do, because you’re here now.”

Bucky smiled and leaned over to kiss Steve’s sharp shoulder.

“You are perfect, you know that?”

Steve snorted and opened the pizza menu, pointedly ignoring the comment.

“What pizza should we get? How are you with pepperoni?”

“I’m good with pepperoni,” Bucky replied lightly. “Always have been partial to sausage.”

Steve laughed.

“Oh my god. Did I say you were romantic? I lied.”

Bucky chuckled and kissed Steve’s shoulder again before sitting back against the pillows. Steve’s face was still flushed and they were both sweaty and naked, but Bucky had never seen anyone more beautiful in his whole life. Screw fancy dinners – Bucky would take order-in pizza any day if it meant he could stay in Steve’s bed.


End file.
